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Anxiety Judgement. (what is the worst you have been told....)

politeSun October 12th, 2017

Its so easy for people to judge and say hurtful things...

share here the worst you have been told about your anxiety :

155
Pikashuppet October 13th, 2017

I get these:

~Suck it up!

~Why are you shaking/anxious?

~Life is tough.

The worst one I have gotten:

~If you do not calm down, I may have to get you medical help.

1 reply
politeSun OP October 23rd, 2017

@Pikashuppet

I am really sorry,

its already so difficult to put ourselves together and people end up throwing such hurtful words at us.

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beautifulPudding72 October 16th, 2017

@politeSun

In the past:

"You are the most awkward person I have ever met"

"You're so weird"

"You're crazy"

"You seem like a different person every time I see you"

"You're not even trying. Just try harder"

"It's all in your head"

"You just gotta thinking positively and it will all go away"

"You seem so reserved"

1 reply
politeSun OP October 30th, 2017

@beautifulPudding72

People can be really mean when they think they understand eth while they absolutely dont. I am sorry you had to hear such terrible stuff while you were yourself struggling within.

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TeenyTinyAppy October 16th, 2017

@politeSun

Some hurtful things I have encountered:

I was admitted to the hospital for diagnosis and was there 4 days. I was told by someone close to me at the time "I wish I could get a 4 day vacation from life!"

"You are just doing this for attention."

"There's nothing wrong with you that everyone else in the world isn't going through."

"Are you doing drugs?"

"You have always been awkward, even as a child."

"What have you been doing that you shouldn't have, that's why you are so nervous."

Ignorant comments can be so hurtful. I am older now and understand that they were truly just ignorant and thought they were right in what they said...but when I was younger it made me feel really bad about myself. Now, I use it as a reason to make sure I fully understand what someone is going through before I give my thoughts on it.

4 replies
themainjane October 16th, 2017

@TeenyTinyAppy

Sometimes I think it is fear that makes our loved ones say things that hurt us. Its a desperate bid at control ... its difficult to see someone you love not faring well (not right). An attempt to somehow make you whole or well enough to keep functioning but I believe it is often born out of love and well-intentioned.

Hope its okay I commented.

3 replies
themainjane October 16th, 2017

And I realize now that you just pretty much said all that. 🙂

Sorry, you took me back to a similar time in my own life.

When occasionally my isolation and the void between us was pierced with words that seemed to reaffirm how alone I felt.

TeenyTinyAppy October 16th, 2017

@themainjane

Yes, it is okay that you posted, I appreciate it actually. :) So, thank you for your that. I do think you are right. I have found that in my life people do try to help somehow but if they don't know how to, it can be hurtful. I try to remember that if they haven't experienced it for themselves there is no way for them to truly understand...so I try not to take it personal.

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warmheartedBeechwood5236 October 16th, 2017

@politeSun My roommate/best friend at the time telling me she didn't have time for me and my problems one moment and then getting upset with me the next and asking why I don't just communicate more.

1 reply
politeSun OP October 30th, 2017

@warmheartedBeechwood5236

wasnt she making it more difficult for you to communicate by behaving that way?

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azianpride October 16th, 2017

That I treat my friend like nothing even though I last week woke up at 4am to her crying and I stayed up to make sure she was ok even though I had work in the morning.

1 reply
politeSun OP October 30th, 2017

@azianpride

That is so kind of you. Shes is lucky to have you as her friend

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warriorprincess732 October 16th, 2017

@politeSun I have anxiety and depression. I have a big heart and I let most people take advantage of my kindness and my inability to say "no" when someone else needs help with anything. The one I hate the most is "Why don't you just stand up to him/her. You're acting silly. Just grow a pair and say something about the way he's treating you!"

1 reply
politeSun OP November 6th, 2017

@warriorprincess732

its so much worse when people blame you for your good intentions and think they can deal with your situation better, they dont even know what you are going through

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eisan October 16th, 2017

In the past I was told (almost on daily basis):

Why are you so quiet?

Why don't you talk more?

Speak louder.

Banal things but when you hear it everyday, it's torture.

But one thing I've been told by my sisters really hurt. It was a chaotic situation and one of my family members was in danger but I tried staying calm and tried to explain it's better to remain calm in situations like this but instead I was told that I'm always too calm and "If I could ever show any emotions!" I don't blame my sisters, cos they were right, and that's why it hurt even more.

Everything was alright in the end but I was so hurt I cried myself to sleep.

2 replies
politeSun OP October 17th, 2017

@eisan

that sounds so terrible, having people misunderstand and judge when you are trying your best.

1 reply
eisan October 17th, 2017

@politeSun

Yeah, well I'm not gonna lie, it didn't feel good. But it was in the heat of the moment so I can understand. Probably they didn't even know they hurt me because I rarely show what I really feel.

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themainjane October 16th, 2017

In the past I realize now, it was the things left unspoken and the things that were not done by myself and others that impacted me the most and also impacted others.

Seems there

rulesdontapply October 22nd, 2017

nothing too uncommon. pretty much everyone had ever gotten this said to them or even something worse.

"she looks like a witch"

"shes such a freak"

"you're too skinny!"

"you're too pale"

"youre too weird"

"stop wearing lenses its ugly"

ive been disliked just because of my looks. i really dont get why. what did i do?

1 reply
politeSun OP October 23rd, 2017

@rulesdontapply

that is so awful, I am sorry you had to hear all that. they were trying to hurt you dear. many people boost their self-pride by doing so. I hope you dont let it get to you, coz that is definitely not you.

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milly1x33 October 22nd, 2017

@politeSun

1 reply
politeSun OP October 30th, 2017

@milly1x33

if only we could tell them that THIS is not making us feel any better

1 reply
Zunderfire January 14th, 2018

@politeSun

We can, but so many people work actively on not being able to understand those problems, and remain ignorant.

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