Addicted to fiction/daydreaming?
Hi, I'm sorry if this doesn't fit, but I really don't know what category to put this in.
I guess I was always an imaginative person, able to occupy myself for long hours. I did a lot of daydreaming and zoning out, and was later diagnosed to have ADHD? I also think I have OCD due to obsessive thoughts and compulsive actions. I feel like these aspects play into this.
Anyway, for essentially my whole life, I never had many opportunities to interact and socializw with people other than my siblings. I felt like I wasn't apart of anything. So, about ten years ago that's when it started. I began to get more invested in television and fiction. I'd daydream about certain shows, imagining i was friends with characters and things like that. I always figured I would stop once I "got a life".
This mainly started to become a problem with the show I'm recently into. I won't go into detail(because this already a humiliating realization for me to begin with), but I've gotten in deep this time. My sisters and online friends are able to do what I do, discuss shows, write about them, make their own characters and things like that, but I just seem to dive in too deep. This has become an addiction for me. It makes me anxious now too because I fear that any further information or plot details could ruin my make believe. By now I feel like an empty person without fiction.
After looking this up, I found out I had what was called "Maladaptive Daydreaming". I readup on it and was horrified at how much this applied to me. I just wanted a fun escape. I never wanted my mind to go overboard, but it always seems to.
The thing is that, I don't want to have to stop liking shows, discussing them, watching them, and even imagining things just for fun. I just don't want to go overboard. I don't want it to interfere with my life and I'm afraid that that's the path I'm headed down. There just isn't much information on this, so I have no idea where to start. I'm still waiting for therapy and I don't even know if my family would listen to me if I confided in them.So any help on this would mean the world to me.
@EarlyOwl Hey Owl, good to see you here! I really appreciate you opening up to us; it takes a lot of courage. It is wonderful that you have looked into this addiction and are gaining self awareness of how it impacts you. That is a major step foward towards recovery! I will admit that as a major fangirl, I understand what it means to be so drawn into franchises that I often neglect reality. Moderation is truly key! Like with any addiction or issue, it helps to establish goals, even if it is something minor (i.e. only limit yourself an hour a day to watching/reading something). How have you been coping lately?
Of course, if you ever need to speak with someone, feel free to reach out to the listeners at any time. Thanks for dropping by, and best wishes! We are here for you. :)
@lovelyWhisper66 I have been trying to limit myself, though hard sometimes. I do still want to enjoy the show without falling down the rabbit hole, so to speak. Im currently looking into other communities, experiences, and techniques for this, and hopefully Ill have this under control
I would actually like to reach out to a listener, but Im not sure what category this would be in, or if many would understand.
@EarlyOwl Absolutely, there is always that slippery slope to watch out for. You have every right to feel cautious. I am proud of your efforts, and it is fantastic that you are looking around for various resources. Yes, when it comes to addiction, the chat topics are not quite wide. We have a thread here for listeners who listen to addiction topics along with other info including listening style.
Feel free to also drop by our discussions if you'd like! We have open chat today at 11 pm EDT in the addiction support room (it opens up 5-10 min before the discussion starts). I hope you find the help you deserve, and you are always welcome to let us know your progress here. :)