Effective Replying

Hi everyone!

Firstly, a huge thank you to everyone who listens to what people have to say in the forums and takes the time to thoughtfully respond and support people ❤️

An important aspect of responding to posts is that the responses are effective in the hope that people feel supported and heard. As members of the Needs Reply team know, we have had some feedback that not all responses are detailed or effective in this sense.

It is important to ensure that we provide people with a supportive and engaged response so please continue to read this post to get tips on how to make sure our responses can be the best they can! Once you have read the post please comment “read and understood” so we know and also feel free to add any extra tips for other people to benefit from - we are a community and can all help each other <3 (some tips have been slightly edited for clarity)

Ask for help, practice and learn:

“Check other posts from the same sub-forum and see how they are tended to and supported since it can give us ideas and information on possibly good conversations and replies” - theriverissinging

“For threads that are seeking answers for some community related questions or needing a more authoritative reply to something specific and you're not sure on those. Feel free to tag the concerned leaders (if you do know accurately) or simply the 7 cups community account @7CupsCommunity or direct them to community@7cups.com or raise tickets as required, https://help.7cups.com/” - sunisshiningandsoareyou

“I haven't personally reached out to one yet, but we can maybe reach out to the relevant sub community's community mentor(s), forum supporters too, if needed some help with replying to the threads in that sub community. Or maybe use our Training Guides/ Self help guides for members, they can be quite helpful too.” - sunisshiningandsoareyou

“Whenever I have spare time, I go over to the LLJ forum, read some informative posts again to refresh.” - anon

“respond to posts that you are familiar with the topic and can sympathetically, empathetically and kindly respond so that your post has meaning and validates the post you are replying to” - MistyMagic

Take care of yourself:

“I don't consider the member chats in PMs and the forum posts seeking support too different to be honest, so it is always a good idea to reply when you have enough physical and emotional availability to support them.” - sunisshiningandsoareyou”

“You are a part of one of the most amazing projects in 7 cups. It is noble of you to try to make as many people feel acknowledged, heard, accepted, seen, validated, supported and encouraged. It's okay to learn as you grow in the role, and practice better replies, one forum post at a time hehe. You don't have to be perfect or reply to everyone, reply as per your pace, when possible and when you think you'll be able to offer better support, everyone's "perfect reply" would be slightly different from each other for sure. You just have to try to meet people where they are, and never get too engrossed in forming a great reply alone, instead focus on a reply that matters, words that will make a difference.” - sunisshiningandsoareyou

“Care for your awesome self, we have only one you. If ever some forum post is too triggering (considering the fact, it meets the forum guidelines), if you're a listener, I believe it should be okay to seek peer support or reach out to a quality mentor. Of course, super okay to hop on to the member account to seek a listener for yourself anytime some words hit too home. Or simply to step away from these and engage in self care, as necessary.” - sunisshiningandsoareyou

Skills and other useful tips:

“We can use the active listening basic skills always, to comprehend what they said and maybe summarise a little using your own words, validate their emotions, empathise with them and offer supportive words. Forums are a great way to build supportive relationships too, never hesitate to ask open-ended questions to them to know more about how they are feeling, what have they tried, how else could you support them etc.” - sunisshiningandsoareyou

“I do understand a certain hesitation with some rather long forum threads, and understandably it gets hard to use all the active listening skills at once, soooo what I usually try is to understand what they are really seeking support for, summarise as much possible and then pick a few major pointers for more reflection, validation, conversation-build up etc.” - sunisshiningandsoareyou

“It simply helps to read and comprehend what someone is mentioning, what do they need out of this post, and how could you make them feel less alone, and more supported at any given point in time. Your effort alone matters. ❤” - sunisshiningandsoareyou

“I usually go with these formulas:

If it's information share: Read + share about what I find interesting/ helpful + thank you

If it's activity I'm interested in: Read + participate + thank you

If it's problem/ issue shared: Read (and read again for me since my mind jump around pretty quick xD) + validate + reflect + end with share tips (not advice) if it's something I'm familiar with/ share 7cups resources if I remember any/ open ended question if it's something I'm not familiar with.” - anon

“For rather fun and light-hearted forum threads, I try to tag some people from the community, as it helps in building the engagement in their thread. Always a great idea to have more people join the fun time, right lol? :P” - sunisshiningandsoareyou

“It is always okay to skip replying to threads you're absolutely not sure what to say, I feel this is similar to how a listener can politely let members know in personal chats if there's a topic they don't take or feel comfortable with and can browse for another listener who might be able to support better. Skipping posts that you've tried to form a reply for and aren't sure if it is supportive, or fulfilling enough to what the member is seeking, is always better than "Thank you for sharing." sort of replies alone, I feel.” - sunisshiningandsoareyou

“First I reflect/summarize, then I offer empathy, then I provide hope through resources or an alternate point of view.” - WarmLightXO

If they respond back to your reply, make sure to reply back to them because otherwise it could be harmful to the person - MistyMagic (it can also create the impression that a reply is being made simply to get the post out of the queue which is not fair to the person being responded to - Book)

Subcommunity team: @CheeryMango @Heather225 @Mel @MistyMagic @tami150 @theriverissinging @SkylarListens @bookworm274

Needs Reply team: @Asher @anxietywarrior23 @bookworm274 @CosmicMiracle @EmmaE @hopedreamlove @joyfulunicorn @Juliak1968 @MidwesternCalmSeeker @ouiCherie @Optimisticempath @pamharley003 @SynSavory @Sunisshiningandsoareyou @SoftFaith2004 @SirenofSerenity @theriverissinging