Fender bender.
The other day, I was visiting an old friend who lives an hours drive from me. We don't get to see each other very often so it was a good visit. I was parked under a covered parking space at her apartment complex. When I backed out to leave, I turned the front wheel too soon and hit a pole with my front fender. It made an awful dent. And I haven't even had my car for a whole year yet. It's an electric car. I felt so bad and embarrassed. What a horrible way to end an otherwise good day.
Now it's stirred up some depression that I thought I had under control. I don't think I can afford to have it repaired but I did order a tool online that might (fingers crossed) help to pop out the dent. Even if I can make it a little bit better, I'd be happy.
Well, just needed to talk about it. I just wish it didn't affect me so much. Feeling sad.
@souljourney1
“Now
it's stirred up some depression that I thought I had under control.”
I get what you mean. Certain things just hit us that right way and it is like
WHAT?!?
My other car, I didn’t even have it for a month. Then bam! Someone hit the passenger side with their door and put a huge dent in it. For the longest time all I saw was the dent.
“I felt so bad and
embarrassed.”
Compassion and Heart. Some of the greatest qualities of us. We feel, understand
we are human. It is ok to feel that way right now. We are here for you.
Comfort if you wish it.
Understanding can be a powerful thing. Maybe talking with a Listener will help. Click here for the list of Active Listeners
Thank you. I feel like all I can see is the dent now similar to you. And it reminds me of my error in judgment which makes me feel stupid. But I know that accidents happen and I shouldn't be so hard on myself. Unfortunately, easier said than done.
@souljourney1
Oh yes it is easier said than done. I am my own worst enemy, LOL.
For me I have to make a conscious effort again, again.
And I then make a conscious effort (which is sometimes very hard for me) to make it a positive thing.
Example on how I would attempt to make it a positive thing.
1. I would not fix the dent for a few days or week. Helpful reminder, I made
the dent.
2. Consciously make effort to be aware. The machine I am driving could have
hurt someone.
3. I didn’t hurt anyone, this is a sign or reminder to me, be aware. I can fix
the car but I can’t fix a person or someone’s pet.
4. I am grateful for this opportunity to improve.
It is a conscious effort to see the good and sometimes it takes a fair amount of effort to be grateful during such harsh times.
These are wonderful words of advice. I did feel grateful that I didn't hit another car or person or animal. I will turn this into a positive lesson for myself to be more careful. Yes, that dent sure is a reminder.... it may be awhile before it gets repaired or it may not get repaired. We'll see how it goes.
TThanks for helping me put things into perspective.
@souljourney1
And thank you for sharing!
You have helped me by reminding me of the positives :)
You are appreciated and valid
@souljourney1. My partner and I have done many similar things. Lately he knocked off the front bumper. We got it fixed and he knocked it off again. He felt really badly also. I hope that you won’t be so hard on yourself.
Thank you for sharing your experience. I even think that if I pay a fortune to have it fixed, what if I do something similar again?... I don't know. I just felt so stupid for my error in judgment.
As for owning an electric car, I really like it. We have solar on our house which helps for charging it. It's a Chevy Bolt EUV and drives smoothly. It's great for driving around town but I wouldn't take it on a super long road trip as I'd need to know where I could get it recharged. Also, it can take 4 hours plus just to get a full charge. That's the only downside.
@souljourney1. That is awesome that you have solar in your house! I have seen that Chevy Bolt EUV. I really like that car. Thank you for the information.
@souljourney1
It can be frustrating and embarrassing when accidents like that occur, especially after having a good day with your friend. I understand that it's affecting your mood and stirring up some depression that you thought you had under control. It's great that you're trying to find a solution by ordering a tool to help with the dent. Even if it doesn't fix it completely, any improvement can bring some relief. Just remember not to be too hard on yourself and know that accidents happen to everyone. If you're finding it difficult to cope with the sadness, it might be helpful to talk to someone you trust, like a friend, 7 cups listener, or family member
Thank you. You're right. I shouldn't be so hard on myself. I don't know why I am but I guess it's true what they say, "We're our own worst critics." I'm trying to learn how to let go of negative feelings.
@souljourney1
Absolutely, learning to let go of negative feelings can be a process, but it's worth the effort. We tend to be our own worst critics. But it's important to be kind and compassionate to ourselves, just as we would to a friend.
Acknowledge that making mistakes is a part of life, and it doesn't define your worth or capabilities. Remind yourself that everyone experiences setbacks and it's how we learn and grow from them that truly matters. Be patient with yourself and give yourself permission to feel sad or frustrated, but also remind yourself that these feelings will pass with time.
Focus on the things you can control, like finding a solution to fix the dent on your car. The effort you put into trying to improve the situation is what counts, regardless of the outcome. Even if the dent doesn't completely disappear, any progress you make can bring a sense of accomplishment and relief
@souljourney1 Hi soul journey. Something similar happened to me! I just fixed a dent that another driver dinged my car. It was the left back side. Took the time to call the shop, deal with insurance and all that. Took about 4 weeks total to finish and move on. And last week, the same thing has happened! The same exact side, while parked, has been hit by a driver. I live in a city where this is common. I have been choosing to just keep in mind there are worse things in life and that it will all be okay. But I wanted to share that with you so you know you are not alone in the world of frustrating dents! :)
I'm sorry you've had this happen to you twice. Very frustrating. Especially when someone else caused the damage. I hope it wasn't hit and run. You are so right, that there are worse things in life. I am grateful that I didn't hit another car or cause harm to anyone. So that's a positive.
Thank you for sharing your experience with me. You have a good way of looking at it. I hope this doesn't happen to you anymore.
