Promises Kept???
I could use your thoughts and guidance....My husband and I are in a situation with another couple that is becoming stressful. This couple have been friends for several years and we felt like we knew them pretty well. We promised to help that couple out on a fairly big volunteer effort that they have going. We are basically performing communication/PR/secretarial duties. For a few months it's been okay for the most part until the past two weeks. The other couple have taken on to much to do (in my opinion) and they aren't handeling their time well. This weekend they exploded at a big event we were at and, you guessed it, several of the volunteer staff quit.
We got thing settled down, but then eariler this week the husband decided to jump all over my husband when my husband was trying to schedule a meeting for the coming weekend with some out of town contributors. My husband didn't jump back, and the husband soon appologized -- begrudgingly. This is the third time something like this has happened.
I've been thinking alot about living authentically lately. That get's me to the point of my question:
At what point do I (and my husband) save ourselves? We promised to stand by our friends and help them with this project. I've reached the point that everything i do feels fake. My husband is livid - he's been mad for the last three days. We've tried talking to them about the stress and communication problems and things got better for about a week, then went downhill again.
At what point does living authentically mean that it's okay to break a promise?
Thanks for listening and any advice will be greatly appreciated.
@MissPen
Wow. I totally get that you don't want to break the promise to your friends, but it sounds to me like you have kept it already.
You have been in this situation for a few MONTHS and tbh helping friends for that length of time is above and beyond.
I suggest you sit down with your husband and talk it through with him, how much you want to be involved with this moving forward. Perhaps you could have a family commitment which will give you a break for a few weeks, and then you could naturally reduce the time you are spending on this project.
Basically, you've already kept your promise.
@DavidEss thank you so very much for your response. I feel like a weight has been lifted. I think your advice will move me in the right direction.
@MissPen
Tell you what, Miss Pen, it was a pleasure.
It's such a shame that when you try to help, you can risk losing some friends who you obviously have lots of history with.
But I think the risk has to be taken. You need your own lives back.