How do you regain motivation?
Not being sure who to ask or how to find an answer, I wanted to present this concern of mine to the group. In Dec I started a diligent effort to address my anxiety and depression and my sleep issues. Completing a Cognitive reprograming of sorts, I started actually feeling better and less stressed. Less stressed about everything. Wonderful! Sleep is more restful, days are more pleasant, life is generally a bit better. Not perfect, but getting better. Heres the hook: less stress sometimes borders on apathy. Work stress drives performance. Lack of work stress combined with apathy is hurting my work performance. Has anyone else experienced a loss of motivation for something that used to be the most important part of your life? What is your advice? Replace that purpose with a new one or infuse some stress back into your life so your performance levels return? Other options? Really interested in other members views and thoughts on this. Thank you .
@SleeplessVet- it is strange how our bodies and minds get used to high levels of stress. Just when I seem to get over one crisis- another one takes it's place. Switching to calmness and purposeful intent is a huge life change for you. I absolutely dont have any answers but am impressed by the positive steps you are making in your life. Take care. Big cat hugs.
@barncat purposeful intent I like that idea
can you share a a bit more about that
@SleeplessVet
I think that to get my motivation back, (because I've been there too), I started with something I didn't want to do, rewarded myself with something I liked to do, and on particularly horrible days or weeks (:o), I made sure I had a present (bouquet of flowers, chocolates or whatever). Make sure you reward yourself for each step forward, because............unless you can afford to stop working................you have to move forward.
I can totally relate to this journey of yours.
I feel as though, for the past couple of years, I've hit chronic burnout.
I have no idea what to do.
Nothing seems to work.
I am literally in chronic burnout.
I can't even find a reason to continue any longer. I think 15-30 years of it has worn me thin.
So if you find any answers, original poster, I'm all ears.
@SilverbackTiger
Thanks for the validation but .. I am also sorry we share this feeling. I will indeed share the answer if I hear it or find it.
Blessing to you.
Amen to all of the above and more.
I have come to realise that having a purpose in my life is actually a gift.
I have lamented a lot recently on the lack of motivation and purpose in my life.@SilverbackTiger
The problem is I haven;t wanted to fabricate purpose just to have one.
And I resisted the personal betterment program for some time cause I felt tired of all the bullshit.
So for now Im working on the agenda "know Thyself"
I'm aiming to better understand me and what makes me tick.
I keep thinking I want to write out all MY values , so I must get to that soon.
At the moment it is writing daily goals and lists. Checking them off and taking pleasure in this simple approach.
I am resisting the urge to bite off more than I can chew.
I am working on the daily growth program here at 7 cups.
that's my approach. I hope it works.
I just wrote this after a short meditation.
hello
what am I doing here
I am a crew member of planet earth
I am a Sapien
I have a right to be here like everybody else
It's no chance that I'm here.
It's ok for me to be here. It's totally acceptable for me to take up space on this planet
I want to contribute to this planet and its occupants,
Here I am, send me.
I embrace the future.
That's my input and I'm hoping it brings back some much needed and missing purpose.
@arnoldziffler1- it is a beautiful poem that you wrote. Thank you for sharing it.
@barncat taa it fell out of me
Great post@SleeplessVet
Interesting to think on and well spotted.
I like considering this problem.
Cheers for sharing
Here is a problem I would like some input on.
My courage quotient feels depleted.
32 burn out as a pastor.
33 start an earthmoving business
37 break up with my wife
40 remarry
45 2nd wife business fails.
49 I go bankrupt
49 try Uber get pissed off. Have a run-in with Uber get fired
50 try taxi shit money!!!
50 find a casual bus driving job that pays the rent
51 COVID arrives no job
You get the picture!!!
How does one fill-up the courage tank and go back out to find a job?
This is not a whinge.
Its a real question?
Wow just reading the timeline is exhausting. But you are still ready to find the next job. Covid restrictions are slowly ending . Sounds like the construction experience
is a good way forward.
@arnoldziffler1- i would like to share your timeline with my husband who is feeling discouraged - he is looking at starting a menial physical job today- that he says is for a younger 24 yo old person- and he is 63!!
@barncat
Absolutely go for it
I might add that I have worked for my friend setting up tents he has a Glamping business. so I have lost a lot of weight doing that in the summer over the weekends.
Currently, I am labouring for cash on two properties.
Chainsawing, taking out weeds, vines, dead wood, cleaning up and then carting it across the property by hand to burn it off or put it in a trailer and take it to our waste disposal so right now I'm losing lots of weight.
@barncat
But still looking for that "courage ".
I know I am working my way towards my goals but emotionally I'm still in waist-deep quicksand
@barncat by the way your husband is a champ
physical work becomes harder the older we get
what a bloke 69 and doing manual labour
I'm somebody that has been out of work alot since the 2008 financial crash and one thing I will say about repeated hitting a wall like you are describing is that no matter what - do no give up. If you give up you will not find work.
Plus this was big for me - I focused on what worked. Not what didn't work. I focused on getting 3 resumes out a day, checking in with references, once a month sending thank yous to my recruiter. A big one and I can't stress this enough also was I trusted in Him to find me work. The longest I was out was 7 months with a huge mortgage. Good luck. Focus on what works. You can do it.
Great thread topic, I'm 53 and burnt out.
Work in the oilfield so the pandemic shut down is only part of the problem. I progressed from working on rigs to supervising them, Sounds great but the stress of supervision is not suited for me, high stress, blatant dishonesty and manipulation. Have not worked since beginning of Febuary, marriage is a failed mess. No freinds or family. But my dog loves me.
@ruffneckred man, I'm hearing you
I identify with the marriage thing also ruffneck
I'm aware that my partner really doesn't want to be in a relationship full stop.
I'm a convenient provider.
I have made a conscious effort in the last twelve months to reach out and build some community.
It's only small and its been hard coming out of hermit phase.
I am calling my kids weekly just to check-in, and I make an effort to visit a friend at least once a week.
You have a good heart ruffneck I like people who don't like that style of leadership.
Its why I don't want to go back to the construction industry.
I like that you said what you did. I'm hearing you. You put that well mate.
How's it going today SleeplessVet
Just out of curiosity, have you read "zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance"
I really enjoyed this book.
@arnoldziffler1
I'm doing ok and appreciate your input and thoughts. Hope we can all find the right motivation. I've always been a provider and responsible to support my family. Old fashioned, but . . it was the way I am programed. So, I don't give myself much slack or choice about work. Military to sweeping floors and cleaning toilets.. to selling hardware.. to analizing processes and program building. There has to be a light at the end of the tunnel.. somewhere. Blessing and good luck Arnoldziffer1
btw.. have not read that book.. but did a quick search.. and will consider that for a future read. Ty
@SleeplessVet I'm programmed the same
It would just be nice to feel the joy at the start for a change
maybe it only ever comes whilst engaged and moving 😳
For you blokes who like to muse and enjoy a road trip and some practical mechanical talk entertained with a man thinking about his life while on the road.
You might like to read "Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance" by Robert M Pirsig
I personally love this book.
I could pick it up and read it again.
One more book for thought.
I recnelty as in last year, read "The Grapes of Wrath"
Set during the Great Depression, the novel focuses on the Joads, a poor family of tenant farmers driven from their Oklahoma home by drought, economic hardship, agricultural industry changes, and bank foreclosures forcing tenant farmers out of work.
Author: John Steinbeck
Genre: Novel
I think reading this gave me perspective, and in a way mentally prepared me a bit for these times we are experiencing.
Cheers
@arnoldziffler1
I'm currently reading "At Hell's Gate" by Claude Anshin Thomas. It was suggested for me by my military family and life counselor.
@SleeplessVet I will check it out
at least I will know what you are reading 😀
I was re-reading your first post here.
The questions posed still remain unanswered in my head.
Have you had any more clarity on the motivation vs stress conundrum.@SleeplessVet
And by the way apologies for distracting the pint away from your question.
This is my first real effort in joining a thread, and I identified with the content and interactions here.
It got me all excited and then I realized how overenthusiastic I was.
So my apologies Sleepless back to your original quest.
@arnoldziffler1
no worries! I get some helpful advice.. but I have to pick the advice or method that resonates with me or will work for me in this current .. new me.
This was my first effort at asking something and starting a thread. I enjoy this site. It seems to be all about helping people.
Here's a question for you @SleeplessVet
How healthy was your ' motivation' before the revamp.
Would you say you we're driven?
snd if so what was driving you?
on thiis side of the game what factors ofr drivers have been removed
@arnoldziffler1
Sorry I am late to reply to this. Prior to this "new me" effort, I was pretty motivated. At work I had a pretty good work ethic. Go in early when needed.. stay late when needed for the good of the job.
That is kind of what drove this question and concern. My work ethic or concern about work is ..almost horrible now. I don't care. It worries me. (some)
I completely understand you.
I appreciate you sharing this, and I understand your concern for the loss of motivation.
I can only confer for the moment.
@SleeplessVet
As a pastor in my early thirties, I hit the wall and went through a complete burnout from overcommitment. I lost my passion and dreams, I was utterly exhausted. As a subcontractor in my late forties, I have been through bankruptcy and loss of job security. This has been exacerbated by relationship troubles as well. These experiences really take the energy out of a person and finding meaning and purpose again has been enormously difficult.