Should I stay in this marriage
By all means I know to reach out to professionals about the situation however sometimes it’s just nice to vent and hear peoples opinions/stories/point of views
my husband and I got married almost 8 years ago. He joined the military after 2 years of us dating. Have 2 children now.
problems: his mom does not like me & did not want to meet the kids. We live across the country from everything we known for the past 8 years and won’t make the changes in his life to get us atleast on the same time zone
what this has caused: he me to change because his mom will never, I’ve had to become pretty much a full time mom and only work part time which I’m okay with but it has its days. Being far from family is getting old
he admits he feels bad not choosing me and the kids over his career. He wants adventure and to leave, at this age and with two younger kids I just want consistency. We have been contemplating divorce.
I'm sorry it sounds like you are having a bit of a challenging time at the moment. I'd imagine it can feel quite isolating with no time for yourself....but finding somewhere to have a rant can only be a good thing so at least you've taken that step by reaching out. First steps are hard so really well done for taking it.
It sounds like maybe you both need to have a proper heart to heart conversation about what you want for the future. Literally lay it all out. Even if you're talking about divorce now, you got together in the first place, you've got kids, and you've got married. Those are big life events you don't go into blindly so you must have some kind of connection in the first place. It depends if you both want to work at it and see things moving forward.
Has he actually said he wants to leave or were you reading between the lines? You obviously know him so only you can make that judgement. I think you are right to want to be prioritised and you're not asking for the world, just commitment from a partner. It must be tough if he's away all the time with young kids, so you're doing a good job. You're not wrong to want support from him.
I guess I don't really have any answers (sorry) and can only reaffirm I do completely get where you're coming from so don't doubt yourself or your feelings because they are valid.
Hope chatting is of some help.
Nickel
The guy in me wants to give advice because we're fixers but you said you just wanted to vent so I'll listen.