Thanks for making this post Cloud.
Its definitely not easy parenting solo.
I went from being a single parent to a solo parent. I am no longer single, but I am still parenting alone, as my current partner is long distance, but helps whenever he visits. The other parent of my son is not in the picture at all, so no co-parenting. He almost made me unalive, so I have a restraining order. He refused to be there for his son unless I get back into a relationship with him, but I'll never go back.
He also does not pay child support and his family are also violent alcoholics like him, so I keep my son away from the paternal side of thr family.
My family isn't great either, due to physically & verbally abusing me, and I have no friends.
I do everything by myself with no help (other than when I'm forced to apply for government assistance, I dont have a good paying job anymore).
Whenever my son gets sick, I have to call of work often, which resulted in me either losing the job or having to leave the job. Im currently having medical issues, and it took FOREVER to get the docs to finally agree to do x-rays and look into it further.
I requested an MRI and CT scans due to what my ex-fiancé (son's father) did to me a few years ago as well as a car accident that occured many more years prior while crossing the crosswalk, back when I couldn't afford to go to the hospital.
I've been through unemployment, loss of my car, many near death experiences, starvation, eviction, homelessness, people stalking me, and worst of all — losing temporary custody of my son after calling the cops on my ex for nearly ending me...
It's been a tough couple of years...
I never thought I would be a parent to be honest. I didn't want to be due to medical issues that ran in the family and my upbringing wasn't the best, already had depression and PTSD... My ex fiance told me he KNEW he got me pregnant and removed protection while (at the time) we were both drinking and I got extremely drunk. He baby-trapped me and made my life *** for the years we were together. Thought it was love, he was my first everything, and I was used to being abused in my old household...
Now? I'm trying to get therapy (there's a LONG waitlist) and I've been going to the hospital for my health issues. I no longer drink alcohol nor do I smoke/consume MJ. Attempting to also remove caffeine from my life.
Furthermore, I have son in daycare and speech therapy and work with his reading skills (he began reading at the age of 3) and he is multilingual, learning my native tongue as well as English and sign language. I've gone to many sessions of DV support groups to recover and FINALLY have a loving partner who understands me and treats me well. I'm working towards my real estate license while he is getting his CDL license. We're actually planning on having kids, but holding off until we are financial stable and have a house together. Just both have some things going on in our personal lives (he's dealing with family, and I'm dealing with a multitude of other things, but my partner still helps me, he's very sweet... I feel bad I cant be helpful yet until I get my real estate license and make better money currently cant work)
Despite this, I am still depressed and often don't feel great due to the chronic pain, but manage with pain relievers... still have to tie up lose ends. I plan on moving out of this city, and hopefully state soon. I dont really feel at home in this country at all, but neither in my mother's country... I've travelled a lot in my youth and feel like a perpetual nomad.
I am hoping things change though this time, as I'll be with my partner and son, away from the city where I have a lot of trauma and have gradually gained agoraphobia...
Apologies for the long ramble, just needed to vent a bit.