How do you speak to people?

I have this problem: sometimes I can speak perfectly, I have a good language, (I am almost bilingual because I manage well in English and in fact I am here) and I am a person who in the past has read a lot, and who likes to study, in short, it is not the language it self that is the problem, it is speaking!

It seems that I cannot communicate. Things take shape in my head and have a sense, I am sure they have, but then they come out wrong, and it is so with different topics! Who is like me? Can you feel what I mean?

If I am talking about personal suffering, or an anecdote, I have a joke, or a story, regardless of what I have to say, I got trouble to express it, and I realize that people misunderstand or are sincerely confused, because I stumble, and trying to explain that I am stumbling because I am in difficulty create even more confusion!

Sometimes I get by with a slight embarrassment because maybe I have just stuttered a little, other times, if I consider important what I have to say, it happens that my brain TURNS OFF the ability to communicate and I create a huge confusion because I realize that I am stuttering and I am stumbling, and people's not understanding and want to change topic, but that thing is important and so I try to fix it but stutter and stumble even more AND IT IS A DISASTER.

And I feel frustrated and embarrassed...

The feeling is exactly this, imagine that communicating is like taking a box and slowly taking out the objects from the box, well, I take one that slips from my hands and trying to grab it I bump the box that falls and while I move my hands to grab the objects that fall, those objects spreads disorderly on the ground. It feels exactly like this...

However, I am 100% aware that it is not always like this, that at other times instead I am very fluent and I even result in being charismatic, in fact, I would not describe myself as a person who does not know how to communicate despite the title.

For me is different from messages and for real life.

Another communication problem of mine, is that I always have to tell the whole story, or the whole concept when I want to express my opinion, resulting in being dispersive, perhaps boring and less effective than I hope, my mother has pointed out to me that often people get lost when I talk in this way, and it makes me sad, maybe I am not used to talking to people? I am a girl without friends who hardly ever goes out so it is likely.

It is not always like this, BUT since it happens too often for my taste, and when it happens it gets in the way of things that are very important to me, for example, my own therapy, I wanted to talk about it not to complain but to find a solution and hear how people with my same problem have faced or solved it!

Maybe if i overcome it life could be a little easier so I can ask for help without stumbling.

I have noticed that it is not so much with whom I am or where I am, I can speak very well with anyone and anywhere and I can also stutter. So maybe the problem is inside me?