Stuck
I haven't gone outside in over a month, except to step out onto the porch and then go back inside. I am a freeloader living with my parents. I don't have a job because of personal issues that make it hard for me to keep a consistent schedule. I drove for DoorDash because I could work whenever. The pay was horrible and my car was not fuel efficient so I ran out of money.
I more or less gave up in early January and ended up here after a crisis line. I talked more in the last couple weeks than I have in years but I don't know where to go from here. I struggle to form lasting bonds with people and get panicky when people are getting too close. Someday I want to talk to someone in real life but I don't know when that will be.
@Pipo216 I'm glad you're reaching out. Even though this isn't real life, this is a step in the right direction- better than nothing, right? I'm also basically freeloading with my parents right now even though I'm almost thirty (it's embarrassing for me) and I haven't been able to make new friends in over a decade, so I can relate, I think. You aren't alone. Do you have anything you are interested in? You can use your interests to direct you toward clubs and classes and teams and events and meetups (like meetup.com) in your area. Like, I just joined a figure drawing class and even though I didn't automatically make a best friend, I felt great talking to people who enjoyed the same thing as I did- even if it's only for a few hours a week. And just know that it's okay for these groups not to work out, or for your desire to continue to fluctuate- I'm technically the head of an artist meetup (I have been for half a year now), but I ghost the meetup and let others take over every couple of months when I sink back into a depression. Talking about this might actually motivate me to rejoin this weekend, lol. We help each other, right? So, just know that even if you give up on social events, you can always hop back in. You haven't failed and you are welcome to rejoin your community. I'm sure there are people in your community that would love to hear your voice and see your face, even if you try to convince yourself otherwise.
@determinedSea4370 It really is better than nothing. I was surprised how much it helped just talking to anybody that would listen on here. I guess I'm interested in a bunch of stuff so thanks for sharing the link i'll check that out. I've never even really thought about art stuff so maybe i'll try drawing something.
I wish you all the very best! It's so hard being lonely
@Pipo216
I'm happy to hear you decided to reach out here, it can be helpful to have an ear to vent to. We're all here for you 💌
