To create a supportive and safe environment for people to seek help by preventing judgment, and unsupportive or invalidating comments.

your gender identity is not real; your struggles aren't as bad as others; you do not deserve help because you are x

Posts that are edited or deleted or violate this guideline generally have a judgmental or discriminatory tone. On 7 Cups we try to support everyone in a kind and nonjudgmental manner. Things like invalidating someone else's feelings or experiences based on attributes such as sex, gender, religion, race, ethnicity, sexuality, etc. fall under this guideline. If you see something like this, please flag it!

If at all possible, the forum moderator should remove the offending content while retaining the post. All edits should include the forum moderator's name and the reason for editing (e.g. offensive content). If the post cannot be retained, the forum moderator will delete the whole post. If you believe a forum moderator has edited or deleted your post in error, you can email forum@7cups.com and we will investigate.

Grey Areas:

I believe that men and women are inherently different when it comes to this stuff and women tend to be much more emotional

While this does present an argument that could feel sexist, it is also clear that it is presented as a belief, not as a fact. To some extent, the context and the tone will matter significantly, in most cases this is likely fine and should not be edited.

I do not understand how you can say you are a boy if you were born a girl

This is a statement that could be read as very invalidating to a person who is transgender, but could in other contexts be seeking to understand as opposed to trying to invalidate. Again, context matters here! When in doubt, do not edit, but as a forum moderator, you can always seek a second opinion if you are unsure!

My Aunt always says that I am a no-good mixed race so I won't go anywhere

In this case, the poster is seeking support on this subject. We should not edit anything that would prevent the poster from conveying the full context of their situation.

To create an inclusive and easily accessible space for everyone to participate and understand the discussions that take place in the forums.

Me he sentido deprimido y siento que no hay nadie a quien pueda acudir en busca de apoyo.

English is commonly used in forums for its global accessibility, ensuring that a diverse audience can participate in and understand discussions. It promotes clarity, consistency, and efficient moderation while enhancing searchability on the internet. By using English, forums maintain a neutral, inclusive platform for users from various linguistic backgrounds, fostering effective and accessible communication.

The forum moderator should remove the post written in any other language than English. Users can expect to receive a message from the 7cups Forum account with an explanation as to why their post was removed, as well as information on how to see Seek in their native language. For any discrepancies with posts, you can email forum@7cups.com and we will investigate.

Grey Areas:

My friends bully me in front of others but when we are alone they are nice to me. I don't know how to handle this.

Mis amigos me intimidan delante de los demás pero cuando estamos solos son amables conmigo. No sé cómo manejar esto. While this does contain Spanish in the post, it is also clear that the user has provided an English translation. In this case, the post is allowed to stay up and does not need to be deleted since there is an English translation and is easy to understand for both English and Spanish speakers

To facilitate constructive criticism and feedback and maintain a safe and supportive environment for all users. Sweeping generalizations, targeting or insulting users and baseless accusations weaken your point, even if the point is legitimate, and escalate the conflict. Regardless of our feelings toward another person or their viewpoint, we must treat everyone with respect.

all admins are heartless this decision was made with no forethought @username is terrible if you believe that, you're an idiot I've spoken to several individuals who think this

Posts that are edited or deleted or violate this guideline generally are unsupportive and unconstructive.

Criticism and disagreement: Criticism of the site and its policies is allowed, as is disagreement on other topics, but posts should always be trying to move the conversation forward. Posts that are edited or deleted are moderated for tone and presentation, not content.

Generalization: When speaking about experiences, you should never speak for other people. I felt unwelcome is acceptable. I know many individuals who felt unwelcome are not.

Triangulation: The forums are a place to have open conversations with people. Similar to group support, as a public forum, we must take care not to promote triangulation or target other users. Constructive posts discussing another user's actions should serve to benefit the whole community and as such should not identify an individual (e.g., I have seen a trend of some listeners abandoning chats quickly with no explanation, and that's hurtful as a member). Commentary on a specific individual should be directed to appropriate feedback channels (e.g., listener reviews, mod reviews, etc.) If you're unsure of how to report an issue, check out this subforum, or feel free to reach out!

If at all possible, the forum moderator should remove the unsupportive content while retaining the post. All edits should include the forum moderators’ names and the reason for editing (e.g. unsupportive content). If the post cannot be retained, the forum moderator will delete the whole post. If you believe a forum moderator has edited or deleted your post in error, you can email forum@7cups.com and we will investigate.

Grey Areas:

• I am unhappy with the decision the site has made.

While this does present a negative criticism of the site, it is also free of sweeping generalizations. While to some extent the context on this and the tone will matter significantly, in most cases this is likely fine and should not be edited.

• Sometimes I get the impression that mentors do not care about regular listeners.

This is a statement that could be read as targeting a person who is a mentor but could in other contexts be seeking to address a problem as opposed to trying to simply criticize. Again, context matters here! When in doubt, do not edit, but as a forum moderator, you can always seek a second opinion if you are unsure!

• I am very upset right now. / I feel attacked

Emotions are normal when conflicts or debates occur. They are okay to have and any feelings are valid. However, if this post had indicated an individual or group they were upset with or turned to attack another individual, this would dip into targeting and require editing.

To protect anonymity and maintain a safe environment for people to give and seek support. The purpose of this rule is to prevent rumors, gossip, and hearsay and direct individual feedback to the appropriate channels where it can be reviewed and actions taken as needed.

@username did this in 1-on-1 with me I had a chat with a person with [description of the issue in extreme detail] @username was modding and muted me unfairly

What people share with us in 1-1 or group chats is confidential and privileged information. While they may choose to disclose to us, they haven't chosen to disclose publicly and we can't make that decision for them. It's okay to seek support on a chat or to express confusion, displeasure, etc. with how something went, but not to publicly share someone else's name or details.

If at all possible, the forum moderator should remove the offending content while retaining the post - this may include summarizing the detail into something more concise / less personal so that the nature of the question or comment can remain without breaking a user's confidentiality. A key question to ask yourself when editing for confidentiality is "Would I be able to identify who they are talking about with the details shared?"

All edits should include the forum moderators’ names and the reason for editing (e.g. confidentiality/chat details). If the post cannot be retained, the forum moderator will delete the whole post. If you believe a forum moderator has edited or deleted your post in error, you can email forum@7cups.com and we will investigate.

• Hey @username, based on our chat I think you might think this was super helpful with your self-harm urges!

It's a good instinct to want to tag someone into a thread that can help them and that is allowed, but that user might feel uncomfortable with it being revealed they have self-harm issues if they haven't disclosed that in the forums themselves. In this instance, it may be best to either edit to remove the references to a chat / their urges or to reach out to the author of the post, explain, and then delete so they can repost more vaguely (e.g., @username - thought this might be interesting or [generic comment on the post, tagging @username in small print]

• [in Listener forums] I had a chat today where the member told me their friends have been ignoring their texts and their parents are yelling at them about school and that they feel alone and want to self-harm but when I asked about other alternatives they said nothing works and I don't know how to help them now

While putting this topic in the Listener forums is a good start to maintaining confidentiality, many users have both L and M accounts and this is still a public forum where we cannot share details about someone else. To seek help with a chat, you can share an overall theme without the detail so that no individual can be identified through it (e.g., I had a chat today about self-harm and not finding alternatives helpful - does anyone have tips on how to support in those situations?)

•  @Username helped me with my eating disorder by telling me about what worked for them when they were struggling - thank you!!!

Shoutouts are great, but the listener may not have been comfortable sharing their personal history publicly. Instead, could read @Username helped me with my eating disorder - thank you!!!

to protect anonymity and maintain privacy and safety. The purpose of this rule is to help enforce boundaries and maintain a safe space through controlled interactions

what is your insta? my phone number is ####### I do not check 7 cups that often so you should email me at email@domain [from member account] Message me on my listener account, @listenername

Listeners and members on 7 cups are required to follow guidelines to maintain safety and a supportive environment. Offsite interactions are not constrained to the same restrictions, and 7 Cups is unable to ensure your safety offline. Additionally, revealing both a member and listener makes it more difficult to place adequate boundaries for those seeking support and increases the risk of stalking or bullying.

If at all possible, the forum moderator should remove the offending content while retaining the post. All edits should include the forum moderator's name and the reason for editing (e.g. anonymity). If the post cannot be retained, the forum moderator will delete the whole post. If you believe a forum moderator has edited or deleted your post in error, you can email forum@7cups.com and we will investigate.

• [from a member account] If you need help with self-harm urges, you can pm me on [listener account username]While there is nothing wrong with offering to support those in need, offering 1-on-1 support as a listener should come from your listener account itself. If this is in a group support room or a forum, for instance, you can switch to your listener account and then offer the support from there.
• This rule excludes posts and links regarding Social Soldiers / 7 Cups blog work. The Social Soldiers or 7 Cups blog are specific teams with very tight restrictions on offsite interactions and more details can be found on their respective team posts.
• 7 Cups does not control relationships of people who know each other in real life (i.e., met separately from 7 Cups), but 7 Cups interactions should not hint at or discuss an offsite contact relationship and having offsite contact with someone you met through 7 Cups is not permitted.
• It is permitted to give links to 7 Cups to others (including your 7 Cups referral link, which directs to the main page) and you may discuss 7 Cups in your real life (while maintaining confidentiality on the member, guest, or listener chats and accounts).

To maintain a professional and supportive environment. The purpose of this rule is to be mindful that cursing or graphic language is often used in abusive settings and so some people are triggered by them. However, we also recognize cursing as a form of informal language, so light cursing is okay in certain contexts. Additionally, when describing your issue, graphic language may be appropriate (with a trigger warning)

you **** (with or without stars) i **** cant **** believe this **** (without stars) they did [insert explicit graphic description] (without trigger warning)

Cursing is allowed, as long as it is not prohibited by the specific community or sub-forum (see Rule 10), it is not directed at anyone, and it is not excessive. Listeners should not curse while on a listener account. Trigger warnings may be necessary (cursing cannot be in the title). Graphic language to seek support may be allowed but requires a trigger warning. In some cases, community-specific standards may vary (e.g., cursing is more liberally accepted in Anger Management, and graphic language regarding sexual acts is more liberally accepted in Sexual Health when used to seek support).

Forum moderators should review category / community-specific guidelines before making edits on this topic. If at all possible, the forum moderator should remove the offending content while retaining the post. All edits should include the forum moderators’ names and the reason for editing (e.g. inappropriate content). If the post cannot be retained, the forum moderator will delete the whole post. If you believe a forum moderator has edited or deleted your post in error, you can email forum@7cups.com and we will investigate.

I had a shit day

This is not considered to be excessive cursing, nor is it attacking anyone else, so assuming this came from a member account, it would be acceptable (provided it is not posted in a community with specific guidelines permitting no cursing). In most cases, this should not be edited.

[with trigger warning] [moderate cursing or graphic language]

As long as this meets the particular community/category guidelines, the trigger warning would make this allowable. Note: there is not always a clear line between moderate and excessive and to some degree, this does require a bit of a judgment call. Our goal is always to avoid editing/deleting when possible, but there may be instances where the content is deemed overtly graphic and working against the goal of keeping a safe space.

[on listener account] [any amount of cursing]

Cursing is not considered professional behavior for a listener and would not be acting in the listener role. Rules in other areas of the site specify that listeners should always behave professionally, and that graphic language should be avoided, particularly in public spaces (e.g., username, bio, or picture). This follows over into other public spaces such as the forums, feed, and group support rooms. The Community Managers are working on amending existing guidelines to make this more explicit.

to prevent diagnosis or self-diagnosis and avoid potentially damaging treatment advice. The purpose of this role is to maintain the boundary between professional and volunteer help. Even those who are doctors in real life are not doctors while they are on 7 cups. We should not be encouraging people to try medications based on diagnosis or self-diagnosis. Instead, encourage them to contact their physician to get the proper guidance on it.

if you have ADHD, taking xx mg of yy medication works wonders I've been taking xx mg of yy medication but it hasn't been helping you need to take more than xx mg of yy medication for it to be effective

7 Cups cannot provide professional prescriptions or diagnoses. While 7 Cups can provide users with information about various illnesses and treatments, it should never be used to diagnose or prescribe treatment.

If at all possible, the forum moderator should remove the offending content while retaining the post. All edits should include the forum moderator's name and the reason for editing (e.g. medical advice). If the post cannot be retained, the forum moderator will delete the whole post. If you believe a forum moderator has edited or deleted your post in error, you can email forum@7cups.com and we will investigate.

• I started taking hormone therapy for my mtf transition last week. In LGBTQ+, it may be useful to mention if you are transitioning.
• I am transitioning off of an antidepressant. For mental health, it may be useful to mention if you are on a medication/transitioning.
• Many individuals use XX medication for treating ADHD, but it can have YY, and ZZ side effects - it could be good to check with your doctor if you're having any side effects medication has known side effects or is known to be used to commonly treat a condition, it can be appropriate to mention the side effects and/or condition it is used for. Be careful to make sure you are not recommending a treatment plan and to encourage others to seek clarification from a professional.

to maintain boundaries and professionalism. The purpose of this rule is to promote self-care and prevent role reversal of listeners and members.

I'm going through a really hard time right now, can anyone walk me through it? (on a listener account), cursing on a listener's account

At 7 Cups we take the listener role very seriously and ask that listeners are focused on giving support and switching to a member account to seek support, to maintain appropriate expectations and quality support

If at all possible, the forum moderator should remove the offending content while retaining the post. All edits should include the forum moderators’ names and the reason for editing (e.g. listener boundaries). If the post cannot be retained, the forum moderator will delete the whole post. If you believe a forum moderator has edited or deleted your post in error, you can email forum@7cups.com and we will investigate.

• -- I can relate to a lot of what you’ve said. When I was struggling with my eating disorder, I often felt like I wasn't sick enough to get help, but recognizing that I wouldn't ever tell someone else they weren't sick enough was a big breakthrough for me
• Sharing your story to support others is allowed and can be a good way to relate to others or to share what was helpful for you. The line is crossed when it turns from you sharing to help someone else to you sharing to seek help for yourself.
• -- I can relate to a lot of what you've said. I also don't feel like I'm sick enough to get help and I don't know what to do.
• In this case, the listener is relating to the member but is not doing so in a way that is giving support but instead is seeking support. This places the member in a potentially uncomfortable situation and crosses the boundary of the listener role. This listener should switch to a member account to post seeking support.
• -- That sounds like a ****ty situation!
• As discussed in guideline 5, cursing from a listener account is considered unprofessional and outside the listener's role.

to maintain cleanliness and usability in the forums. The purpose of this rule is to keep the forums organized and accessible for users.

Copying and pasting the same post in multiple threads, copying and pasting the same thread in multiple categories, copying and pasting the same post multiple times in one thread, creating the same thread as someone else

Duplicate content in excess comes across as robotic and spammy (covered more in-depth in rule 9), as well as making it more difficult for users to seek out and find relevant content.

The forum moderator should delete all duplicates, retaining one version either in the most relevant location or the one with the most comments or upvotes. Forum moderators can also reach out to the author to see if they have a preference on which is retained. Any edits should include the forum moderator's name and the reason for editing (e.g. duplicate content). If the post cannot be retained, the forum moderator will delete the whole post. If you believe a forum moderator has edited or deleted your post in error, you can email forum@7cups.com and we will investigate.

Quoting another forum post

Sometimes you may find that quoting a portion of another forum thread is useful to the point you are trying to make or the support you are trying to give. This is generally okay, given the quoted portion is not more than 5 lines. For quotations that are 5 lines or more, linking to the original thread or summarizing and giving credit to encourage others to read from the source is an acceptable alternative.

Accidentally posting duplicates

Sometimes a post will be posted multiple times by accident. This is most often due to a poor internet connection or the browser resending information. Be not afraid! You can reach out to a forum mentor/member leader/teen star, email forum@7cups.com, or flag the duplicate posts and a forum moderator will delete the duplicates.

Posting a thread on a similar topic

We all have different perspectives, which means we may have a different approach or thought process on a problem. If you see a thread already exists on a topic you are interested in, but it does not quite address what you need or want it to or you have a different spin on it, it is perfectly acceptable to create a new but similar thread.

to maintain cleanliness and usability in the forums. The purpose of this rule is to keep the forums organized and accessible for users.

I'm collecting responses for a study at school! Take it here[link to survey] buy superproductMAX here [link to product] watch Super Popular Newly Released Movie/Show here[link to viewing platform]

Spam takes away from support, including an individual's ability to seek or give support and build community.

If at all possible, the forum moderator should remove the offending content while retaining the post. All edits should include the forum moderator's name and the reason for editing (e.g. spam content). If the post cannot be retained, the forum moderator will delete the whole post. If you believe a forum moderator has edited or deleted your post in error, you can email forum@7cups.com and we will investigate.

• Moderators may use AI checking software to check the authenticity of content. If it is found that the content is not authentic, it will be removed.
• Moderators may check all content posted by individuals and compare to determine whether the content being posted is authentic.
• Content which lacks human or personal touch may be recommended back to you for editing.
• Where AI software or other content is being used to supplement your forum content, please cite the source appropriately.
• Community Mentors are available to offer guidance to all community users on using AI to create content.
• Making multiple threads and producing lots of content at once may be a cause for concern. We want to give everyone the same opportunity for their posts to be seen so please focus on one topic at a time.
• If you’re making a thread with lots of detailed content, put it all into one thread. This will help greatly with reducing the likelihood of forum flooding and will enable other community users to find and engage with your content easily.

to give people more control over their threads and communities. The purpose of this rule is to be mindful of other spaces.

Weight and calorie amounts are a community-specific trigger for ED, only Teens should be posting in a dedicated Teen subforum (within reason)

Certain subcommunities may have additional rules as well as the general Forum Rules based on community-specific triggers, needs, etc. Please be mindful of these and respect the community you're participating in.

 If at all possible, the forum moderator should remove the offending content while retaining the post. All edits should include the forum moderator's name and the reason for editing (e.g. community guidelines). If the post cannot be retained, the forum moderator will delete the whole post. If you believe a forum moderator has edited or deleted your post in error, you can email forum@7cups.com and we will investigate.

• Refrain from mentioning specific weights or calorie counts to avoid triggering others.
• While you're in the Eating Disorders subcommunity please avoid these triggers (calories may be mentioned in another subcommunity if applicable). Found here https://www.7cups.com/home/eds/#guidelines
• Cursing is not permitted and must be asterisked. It is fine to vent and to express appropriate anger but as curse words have often been used during abusive and traumatic experiences, we ask members and listeners to asterisk abusive/curse words to avoid triggering and upsetting members where possible and to maintain a respectful environment and to encourage the positive and healthy expression of anger.
• The Trauma Support subcommunity doesn't allow cursing in any of its sections. Found here https://www.7cups.com/home/trauma/#guidelines
• Mentioning specific methods of self-harm is appropriate in the following contexts only:

  1. Speaking about self-harm in the past tense. Ex: I used to struggle with cutting.

  2. When talking about coping mechanisms that are specifically applicable to a specific method of self-harm. Ex: Holding ice is a coping mechanism to cut.

  3. When used in an educational context: Cutting is a common self-harm method for those living with BPD. Ex: Trichotillomania can be a form of self-harm

  HOWEVER: When possible, the member should replace their specific method with ‘self-harm.

  Find more here https://www.7cups.com/forum/SelfHarmRecovery_65/SelfHarmRecoveryCommunityTeam_413/UpdatedSelfHarmRecoveryGuidelines_182199/

• Posts about billing. No discussion of billing can be conducted in the forums as they are not an appropriate customer service channel and it does not protect privacy. All feedback and requests should be directed to support@7cups.com.
• Talks about specific services rendered between an individual and a therapist (HIPAA concerns/ privacy/confidentiality laws)
• Comments or complaints about a specific therapist or communication with site admin

• If a therapist directly solicits. You can edit the thread & share the forum posting guidelines.
• If someone asks a question about therapy with specific information about who their therapist was/is or the services rendered. You can edit the post to remove the specific information. From there link to the FAQ page.

Originally posted here!