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What can I do to better manage my overwhelming sexual desires by my own without a counsellor/psychologist? How can I stop masturbating and stop watching pornography?

Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Mar 20, 2021
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You can start by understanding the pattern of this behavior. When do you typically watch porn and masturbate? Is it when you're alone in your room? Is it when you're bored? Understanding this will help you to determine what to do so you won't fall into it the next time. For example, the next time you're bored and you notice that you start thinking about opening porn, do something different instead. The way our brain works is by following a pattern that has a reward in the end. There is a reward that you give your brain by watching porn and masturbating. You need to find something else to change that pattern.
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Profile: JessMRose
JessMRose on Apr 10, 2021
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Replace the desire into something else that is physical too like potentially writing a blog, start being active like exercising or talking to friends.With everything in life that has been something of a habit it can take time so be patient with yourself. IT would be helpful if you can do increments of slowly decreasing the times one does the undesired activity. For example if it was happening 7 times a week then decrease to 5 times then eventually go to the 2 times a week. It is important to be patient and aware that in life things may take time.
Profile: TranquilTurns
TranquilTurns on May 8, 2021
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There are people out there that do not masturbate or watch pornography at all. The term for this is "nofap" and there is a community out there that supports each other with this movement, both men and women are involved in this type of movement that aim to increase self control and reduce addiction to masturbation or masturbating to pornography or watching pornography. There are also biological and mental benefits to this. Being involved with this community with be of great help and increase your awareness of your own actions regarding your topic. Control over sexual desires takes time and is a process so if you do start working on this problem, don't beat yourself up too much and know that there will be relapses and failures.
Profile: allnaturalUnicorns70
allnaturalUnicorns70 on Jan 12, 2022
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Step 1 is probably to figure out what is missing in your life that makes you want to do it in the first place. For most people, it isn't just the sexual urge. It's loneliness, feeling disconnected, hiding from responsibilities or feelings that you don't want to acknowledge. When do you most often find yourself struggling with those urges? Is it when you're busy, feeling successful and in demand? Or is it when things are quiet, it feels like no one cares about you, or you're feeling tired/sick/sad? Do things to "fill your tank" of self-love and appreciation, and it may be easier for you. Staying busy and successful has few downsides. Best of luck to you!
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Jan 16, 2022
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Sexual desires are physiological needs and may not be connected to your psychological state. Even if you try to restrict yourself, it may not be good for you and may have a negative impact on your mental health. But if you still want to curb it, you could try gradually accustoming yourself to not masturbating and watching porn. Slowly increase the time between your masturbation sessions. For example, 1 day don't, 1 day do, 2 don't, 1 do, 3 don't, 1 do, so on and so forth. Or if this is too much, 1 don't, 1 do, 1 don't, 1 do, 2 don't, 1 do, 2 don't, 1 do, so on and so forth. Hope this helps!
Profile: DavidEss
DavidEss on Mar 23, 2022
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The real question here is "How can I better manage... without a sexual partner" and the answer is that it's very very difficult, if not impossible for most people. Our bodies are designed to want intimate and sexual contact, and any attempt to deprive our bodies of that will meet with real, and from time to time overwhelming, resistance. There are two outlets for this energy in my opinion: creativity and masturbation, and unfortunately they don't work completely. And depending on your cultural background, masturbation can come with a lot of guilt, although it is an entirely natural way of dealing with the excess energy, and certainly will create less problems for you than a partner chosen too quickly. It has been said that it's a mistake to go food shopping when you are hungry, and that applies to sex, but more so. Watching porn does not help in dissipating unwanted sexual energy: in fact I believe that in can warp the natural fulfilment of our sex drive within a sexual relationship. Brain scans show that in some people, the same areas of the brain light up when viewing porn, as light up in any addict when they are within reach of satisfying their addiction. It's probably too late to tell you that it's best avoided completely, but the sooner you give porn up, the sooner you will return to being able to satisfy your sexual urges in a meaningful relationship with a real human being.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Apr 14, 2022
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Anxiety grounding techniques work well for helping calm/control sexual desires. Try 5 Senses, Breathing, 3-3-3 rules, play a memory game, start categorizing your surroundings, remove yourself from the situation, and more. Just try looking up "grounding techniques for anxiety". Sexual desires are not something easy to control. But with diligence, you can help make it manageable. When trying to stop masturbating or watching pornography, making it harder to do this behaviour is helpful. Put parental blocks on your phone/computer/etc. Limit the sexual content you watch/consume on social media. Often watching porn or masturbating become a habit, and making it harder to do the behaviours can break the habit. Most of all, be kind to yourself. Change is hard, but changing sexual desires/behaviours is harder. reward yourself for the progress you make (no matter how small) and don't beat yourself up for making mistakes.
Profile: kywaaah
kywaaah on Apr 28, 2022
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There are various ways we can manage our overwhelming sexual desires. Distracting ourselves with other activities, such as our other hobbies that are productive can help reduce the sexual frustrations and desires that our body is demanding at the moment. Sometimes, a cold shower or bath also helps. Other times, just really encouraging yourselves to be around people, such as our friends and families help too. Being around people will make us feel conscious about doing things like these. Also, if you are religious praying for guidance can also help you stop masturbating or watching pornography. If this persists, it is often better to discuss it with a therapist.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Apr 29, 2022
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Assuming that you can't see someone that can help you with it at the moment, I would focus on maybe seeking support in online communities. It might sound silly, but hear me out, if you are struggling with something like that there are people out there who have gone through what you have and overcome it. I have seen a lot of them on Reddit. I think it could help you to stay on track, get some tips or just feel supported. Other than that, finding your triggers and slowly reducing the amount of porn you watch could help, maybe work out and fill your schedule so you don't have much time and energy to do it anymore, hope this help!
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