My father hasn't worked in a decade and didn't care about providing for his family or talking to us. His interaction with us is limited to temper tantrums.How do I deal with the hopelessness?

I'm sorry to hear that you have had to experience this and that you're feeling hopeless. Someone else asked a question similar to this and one thought that I always tell myself came to mind - Sometimes in life, there are people who show you who you WANT to be like and then there are people in your life who show you who you DO NOT want to be like. Both types of people and their examples are beneficial to us in my opinion. I had such a disdain for my adopted mother and I always said she never taught me anything until just one day it occurred to me that she had taught me exactly what I never wanted to be like. I have actually been comforted by that revelation on more than one instance. It sounds like your dad doesn't respect your boundaries either....there are great resources and threads on boundaries here. I have used them myself.

i can see where youre coming from, i’ve been through a similar experience. the feeling of hopelessness is a horrible way to feel but there are ways to deal with this. consider everything you have achieved and will achieve in the future, and how well you’re doing as you need to give yourself credit because as hard as things have been you’re still reaching out for help and carrying on even when it feels hard, as hard as it can be possibly mentioning this to him might help as i’m not sure if you have mentioned it to him before. he might act differently if he knows how you all feel