What's the best way to get over loneliness?
Shanna
on
Nov 25, 2014
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That's a really great question, and one I'm still figuring out for myself! As silly as it sounds, try to be your own best friend! I'm beginning to learn the difference between "being lonely" and "being alone" and that there are a million ways to take advantage of that. It's really hard when you feel that you don't have anyone there for you, or when you feel disconnected even when you DO have people around, and everyone feels loneliness differently and treats it differently as well, but I try to enjoy the time alone whenever possible. I read a book, I go for a walk, I buy an ice cream cone or watch a movie. When you strip away the fear of being alone, you can sometimes find that it isn't so bad after all. And when all else fails, pet a dog or come visit us as 7 Cups!
Anonymous
on
Jul 2, 2015
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The healing agents for loneliness are awareness, acceptance, and compassion. Here’s how it works:
Awareness: Choose to bring your awareness to your experience. Pay attention to how your body feels—the hollowness in your chest, the constriction in your throat, the heaviness of your body. If you feel the sadness well up within you, allow yourself to cry without restraint.
Acceptance: Many people instinctively try to run from loneliness. Sometimes they try to hide from it by numbing themselves. They might sleep, watch TV, or play video games. Or, they might try to distract themselves with chores and activities. They keep busy and superficially engaged in life. But none of this really works—at least not for the long haul. The aching emptiness breaks through numbed bodies and mindless activity.
Sometimes, people try to get rid of the pain by blaming themselves for it. They criticize themselves for being unworthy of others. They see all their flaws or mistakes and demean themselves for them. Frequently, their unconscious hope is that if they could identify what’s wrong with themselves and fix it, then they can make the pain go away. Or, if they can’t make it go away, they can at least make sense of it. But they only feel worse for their efforts.
Instead, choose to stay with the feeling. Acknowledge your loneliness and choose to continue being aware of it.
Compassion: Practice reminding yourself that others feel lonely, too. It is part of the human experience that most people share at some time or other. And just as you would show compassion for anyone else who suffers from being lonely, you also deserve this caring response. So, choose to see yourself with perspective—as you would see someone else—and tell yourself that it is sad that you feel so alone.
If you have supportive others in your life, reach out to them. Take a deep breath, pick up the phone to text or call, and ask for support in whatever form you need it. Allowing yourself to truly connect with others will help you feel emotionally stronger and less alone.
Strange as it might seem, there are benefits to loneliness, so you don’t necessarily want to be totally without it. By feeling lonely, you are able to understand and have compassion for others who feel similarly. Your loneliness can also be a crucial signal that your relationships are not as emotionally close, supportive, or engaging as you really want them to be. So it offers you a chance to identify this problem and make efforts to fix it.
As you consider these ideas, keep this in mind: The person who you are right now is in pain, a very human kind of pain in which you feel different from all other people and yearn to feel connected. Just as it would be sad to see others struggle with this, it is sad that you feel this way. And just as you would naturally feel compassion for their pain, you deserve the same compassion. So accept and feel your loneliness. Then offer yourself compassion. Doing this will help to ease your pain, open you up to experiencing a sense of feeling connected, and help you to take the necessary steps to reach out to others.
silverMusic21
on
Jul 1, 2015
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well the best way is to get some company . the more you're alone the more you will feel lonely , Just tag along with your best mates and have some fun.
WhitneyValen
on
Dec 25, 2014
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Loneliness is less about physically being around people and more about the amount of positive interactions one has on a daily basis. A great tool for gathering more positive interactions is by participating in community service. Whether you're scooping soup on Christmas day or reading to children in your local library, the odds are, someone will remind you of how important your existence is to them. Someone will remind you the reason you're alive. Someone will give you a reason for living.
Cielxblu
on
Nov 25, 2014
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The best way to get over loneliness is to surround yourself with positivity, stay occupied with a hobby you love or just simply find new interests :)
Johnny20
on
Nov 25, 2014
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Try not to spend most of your time alone. If the nature of your work keeps you away from direct contact with people then try to do your best to see people on your weekends.
Anonymous
on
Dec 4, 2014
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For me, trying to be of service to other people is the best way to get out of my own head. A wise person once said that the surest way to have a bad day is to spend it thinking only of yourself.
HelenaRayner17
on
Jul 19, 2015
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Actually there's no easy way to get over it but with time you kinda get used to it. Try to distract yourself with whatever makes you forget the feeling of loneliness like listening to music,drawing or whatever interests you as long as it's a healthy alternative.
Anonymous
on
Jul 30, 2015
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I cannot control what other people say or do (sometimes I wish I could!). So, I have to look to what I can control...and, with loneliness, I have found that several things are within my control. First, I occasionally go out to dinner at a restaurant even though I'm dining alone because it will allow me to have some type of interaction. I also try to say hi to my neighbors and take my dog to the dog park because I interact with other dog owners there. For me, the best way to get over loneliness is to spend time with my animal...whether that's at home or out running errands. I'm never alone when Rocket is around! :P
Anonymous
on
Dec 7, 2014
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The best way to get over loneliness, from personal experience, is by distracting yourself. Whether it's by getting involved in clubs and activities or school or work, it's important to keep yourself busy.
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