Why do I always say things I don't mean?

I would say this is your lack of self-control. Ask yourself how much do you know yourself, maybe even try writing down what you feel like you are or your personas in front of different people. Lack of self-control can drive us to do things that we regret afterwards. Also it can be a result of anxiety or quick (and bad) decision making. Practice in front of mirror. Start evaluating your sentences. You can also go to the web and search up questions (the questions that ask you what you would say in a situation), also you can read books, I would recommend one *How To Win Friends And Influence People*.

Sometimes we don't take time to think before we act. It is almost natural to do so and we must try ourselves to think and act differently. By taking steps to pause before we speak ensures we are being thoughtful in our speech with others. At that time we are able to truly think of someone else in our discussions, reflect on what we might say and how it might affect the person we are in conversation with. Taking just a couple of seconds to think how our words might hurt or help is very beneficial and could save a lot of trouble in the long run. T - is the thought true? H - Is the thought helpful? I - is the thought inspiring? N - is the thought necessary? K - is the thought kind?

There may be certain unconscious triggers driving the things you say. Sometimes when we repress our emotions, they can rise up to the surface and manifest in situations unexpectedly. For example, many people who have family trauma or suffered abuse, experience great feelings of anger and resentment, which they repress because they want to feel normal like everyone else, or because it is too difficult to confront and resolve their emotions and their trauma. Then sometimes when they are with their partners, those repressed feelings of anger might rise to the surface, and they find themselves fighting with their partners a lot, even over small insignificant things. Alternatively, you may have learned and developed ineffective communication habits/strategies from your parents or partners, from toxic relationships, which led you to communicate your needs in unhealthy ways. Part of you recognizes how these forms of communication are damaging to your relationships, but they are also familiar and instinctive to you. It's not that you are a cruel and terrible person, but rather your experiences have caused you to have emotions inside of you, such as hurt, anger, sadness, fear, maybe rejection, which eventually find ways to reveal themselves in how you communicate to others (maybe conflict oriented communication, maybe hurtful comments, wounding and criticizing people you care about).

Sometimes we say things we don't mean when a particular emotion takes control of us. Often, it's anger or frustration or feeling hurt. When we're unable to reign these emotions is or give us ourselves time to sit with the emotion, we're likely to do or say something impulsive. There are a couple of things that can help with this. Journaling is one. You can always write down your frustrations instead of saying them. This will help in lowering the intensity of what you're feeling, allowing you to express yourself more deliberately and calmly. Meditation can also work wonders as it helps to calm the mind and develop the practice of observing your emotions and thoughts rather than identifying with them. It's our identification with our emotions that give them control over us.

I think it happens to the best of us, especially when emotion is involved. I'm not sure whether it's a talent, experience or practice are factors in being able to control yourself. But they definitely play a part. Becoming aware of yourself and your surroundings are key to becoming a better you. When you know that you are focussed on improving, becomign cooler and trying to come forward through an approach that is based on not hurting others. You will be able to control yourself in ways that you previously thought you might not. Saying things you don't mean is but one mistake you could possibly make during your life. Life is a journey of a thousand steps and it starts with a single one. Think positive, believe in a brighter future and never get lazy about self improvement.

Sometimes I say things because I am afraid to be honest. Maybe I say things that I do not mean if I am nervous. Maybe I say things that I do not mean if I am scared. Maybe I say things that I do not mean if I am not sure what to say. Maybe I say things that I do not mean if I am angry. Maybe I say things that I do not mean if I am frustrated. Maybe I say things that I do not mean if I am hurt or feeling sad or disappointed.

We often say things that we don't mean when we are talking too fast. I often find myself in that situation when I fail to get my true thoughts in order. When we do that we might let words and ideas slip out that is not how we truly feel. We might end up saying an intrusive thought or simply misspeak. My advice is to slow down, there is no rush. Think about what you are about to say. After you have filtered through your words, you will have a better chance of saying what you truly need to say. If you are dealing with an issue of purposefully saying things you don't mean, you might be dealing with a self-esteem issue, comfortability issue, or you might use to push people away.

It is because you don't take time to rethink what you will say. Regardless of impatience of others it is always wise to take some seconds or even minutes to rethink what you will say and how you will say in order to be tactful and respectful and that you will convey the information you wished to convey. Therefore, it is wise not to be in hurry to answer. If the person you are talking with, is impatient, it is wiser to ask for some time to respond than to tell something right away. It can sometimes be very difficult, but it is worth trying.

Fear can prevent people from speaking their minds. Under the effect of anger so many people lose control of themselves and say things they regret later. When a person is calm, he can access all of his brain. When a person gets angry, only certain areas are accessed and that’s why they say horrible things. Fear of embarrassment can prevent people from saying what they want. People who have low self esteem can lie in order to make others think highly of them. I believe identifying the reason why you say things you dont mean will be an helpful way to address it.