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My long-term boyfriend told me that my mental health has affected him and he just wants to be friends as though nothing more ever happened. This really hurts me. What should I do?

Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Mar 31, 2022
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Perhaps it is better to take time to be friends and readdress the matter of a relationship in the future. It sounds like you are dealing with some mental health issues and while it is important to have a support network, you need one that will be there for you. If your boyfriend is backing out, it's possible that he isn't the right person for the task at hand. Better to let him back out now than to leave in the middle of your absolute rock bottom. Find people who are willing to work WITH you AND support you. Remember your worth, if he doesn't want to then its his loss not yours. Move on to better opportunities.
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Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Apr 16, 2022
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First of call communication is so important, if he is willing to do that. Maybe also consider going to therapy together to try to see if the issues are workable. Sometimes we are not aware of how we are with others, so that would be good for both of you. You also should reflect on your relationship...see if this person isn't there for you at your worse, is he really suitable for you? Does he really care about the whole you?Everyone struggles with mental health, it doesn't go away in one day. Even if you feel better, you will have days where you don't, and you only deserve someone who can be there for you at all times.
Profile: HereToListen888
HereToListen888 on Apr 30, 2022
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I understand how you are feeling right now because I went through the same thing and I know that right now you can only feel hurt and can only feel pain because of what your boyfriend has said. When it happened to me I was also really affected and hurt but when time has passed I got through it and I know with absolute certainty that you will get through it too. It may not be now or tomorrow but I know that the day will come where you are not affected by the pain that you are feeling now.
Profile: silverunicorn123
silverunicorn123 on May 26, 2022
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It is really tough to hear from a loved one that they can no longer support you. I personally understand how upsetting this can be. I want you to remember that there are so many people who will not walk away during the tough times. This person, although you are in a commited relationship with them, can not be a support system for you. In the long run, you need people that will stay with you through thick and thin. I know for a fact that there are so many people that are here to support you and love you. You got this!
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Jun 15, 2022
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Inquire as to exactly what he means by your "mental health". Take a look inside your soul and determine what YOU think about your mental health. If you think it's okay, then ask him to explain what HIS conception is regarding being 'just friends' vs a more intimate relationship, even though currently that is not reality? It's possible his concept of mental health is different from yours? If you think you are mental health, point that out to him. Also ask him to clarify and provide examples of his conception of mental health. If it comes down to the fact that you feel your mental health needs attention, seek help and tell him your intentions
Profile: GoldenRuleJG
GoldenRuleJG on Jan 29, 2024
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This sounds like a really upsetting spot to be in. As much as its important to consider your feelings, its also important to consider your boyfriend's feelings and where you stand with each other in the relationship. What parts of the relationship show a healthy dynamic and what parts show an unhealthy dynamic? As long as you both have an open, honest communication on feelings, boundaries, and your own values- whatever the outcome is, you both cannot say you did not give it your all. You are welcome to chat with one of our listeners to chat about what you are going through and receive emotional support. Take care
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