How do you deal with the temptation to contact your ex?

hdvbfrfh hff gre hrr huh deg ftgd htrf thff rreg gtr gr fhd fhr ju fsn bcv bcvbvcbbv bvc bvc bvc bvc bvc bvc bvc bvc bvc bvc bvc bvc bvc bvc bvc bvc bvcb bvc bvbc vbcb vbc cb bc cb bcb cbcb cb vb vb vb vb v b bv bvb bvb vb vb bvb vbv bv bvb vb vb bvvb vbvbvbvbvb vvv vvv v

You tell yourself that the ex is an ex for a very good reason. If it didn't work out the first time, the odds are not in your favor to likely work out a second. It's best to spend that energy with new relationships or working on yourself. Learning lessons from why an ex is an ex is a good exercise. Therefore, before making the effort to contact them, sit down and make a list of the reasons why things did not work out between the both of you. If the list is lengthy or includes phrases such as abusive, wasn't right for me, couldn't communicate, poor libido, unable to express emotions, or a number of other deal breakers - by the end of the list you'll likely have enough reasons why contact is best left undone.

I feel a deep connection with my ex, but I remind myself that there are other things I'm connected to. I need to keep myself grounded, and I can do that by reaching out to other friends, painting, listening to music, playing piano and writing music, or doing another activity that makes me genuinely happy and calm. I often feel the need to do something "crazy" or wild to get my heart racing, but by grounding myself I can find other ways to make myself happy in a more sustainable way without doing something that could be unhealthy for me.

That depends on how you actually broke up and what terms . Every situation is different if you went your separate ways on speaking terms and both of you agreed it was the best thing for you and your ex and you are happy enough to still be friends you can still do that . But if it was not on bad terms you are better just moving on and looking to the future and remember good times will return after giving yourself time and space to do so. It takes time and support from good friends and family to overcome that temptation

It helps to remember the reasons why the relationship ended. The reason most people go back with their ex's or have a desire to have them in their life is because they overlook the problems they had and focus on the good times. A relationship ending is a big decision to make and whether or not the person is in the wrong during that relationship, we often place blame upon ourselves, even if we are not. If the relationship ended through mutual agreement and there weren't any significant reasons to end it and you or them simply wanted time to figure out what they wanted in life, sometimes it can be a good idea to let it play out and let them come back to you. If it ended badly, it's always good to remember that ex's are ex's for a reason. I hope this helps :)

It's difficult at the moment; many people find that they feel that they want to reach out to an ex - it may be something to do with the uncertainty of the times we're in, that they feel compelled somehow to close off unresolved matters, or the loneliness of lockdown is forcing them to chase up old avenues. If you feel the need to get in contact solely because of lockdown, then bear in mind that this situation is not forever and let the need pass. If it's to do with wanting to return to them, then consider what went wrong and why the relationship ended in the first place. Contacting exes is often like picking at a scar; you're not helping it heal if you continue to chase after them.

I would listen to music and/or even though negative thoughts are bad, I would think of times and things they did to upset me, this will take away the urge tp engage in communication. Besides that I will often talk to a friend or family member who knows what I habe gone through and they will encourage me then why it ought to be a bad idea. When no one knows the history I would completely put my phone or communication device away and find something else to keep me busy until my thoughts are entirely somewhere else and my focus away on contacting them.

One thing that can really help with the urge to contact your ex is to write a letter, which you then burn/bury/put away, but do not send to him/her. You probably have many emotions boiling over and certainly you have unsaid words to that person, and saying them is healthier for you than reaching out and letting all of that file into the category of "I miss them/want them back", which is likely not entirely true! Relationships end for a reason but you're very entitled to the chance to work through your feelings and say what's in your heart. I think that saying the words is more important, therapeutically speaking, than anything else.

Well, if you are the dumper than you are right about the fact that your ex might not be back. And this is why we love them actually; because they have dignitiy, they know their self worth and don’t let you jeopardize their value! Believe me you would do the same things if your ex came back and you’d have a worse break up than the previous one. I believe exes should leave some space for each other when they are parted so no disrespectful things happen that you might regret later. If you just need motivation then don’t look for it in the outer world but in your inner world. For instance we women look for outer motivations generally. We seek for someone who will admire us or pay attention to us to make ourselves feel better, like a princess or beautiful. But we should rather count on our intellectual and skills, cause they what helps in the long run. Not strangers coming in and out of your life. So get better at who you are and what you do in general, learn things, make a happy life of yours, show them you are more than just a spouse. That’s how you gain respect in society and have long lasting relationships, by having a life of your very own that no one can shatter but only they would want to join :)

Imagine all the frustration and pain they caused you when you were together. Remember why you broke up with them. There's always that feeling you made a mistake and you might regret it but in the future you'll be glad you did it! You'll find someone new if that's what you want. And if picturing all of that doesn't work, there's a technique that has proven useful to me. Put an elastic band on your wrist and everytime you think of them, pull the elastic band and release it. Just remember why you broke up. Sure, there were good memories but don't focus on those.