The Facebook "Seen" message gives me a lot of anxiety! When I see that the person has "seen" the message, but does not reply, I start thinking about all the possible reasons why they would 'ignore' me... Does anyone else feel this? If so, how do you cope?

Well instead of thinking about all the reason why they would ignore you ....think about why haven't they replied you, i mean to say that don't judge or think that they are ignoring you maybe something came up and they are not able to reply at the moment. Try to think in a positive way. It happens with almost everyone, think like you are in their place and you saw the message and haven't replied and what could be the reasons. There could be a lot of reasons and the negative reasons will give you anxiety only so think positive because after all they reply after sometime.

It may sound strange but most of us have the tendency to have the black or white thinking. To our human eyes there are so many different colours in the physical worlds. With that being said, there are so many options and possibilities. On a micro level, as an individual, we can be busy managing different things in our lives. Someone has seen our messages but not giving a reply. It is only a fact. How do you interpret the fact? You can think of the worst of the person. You can think of the best of the person. A fact itself doesn't make us suffer. Judging the fact may cause us suffering. I choose to be open-minded about it. It is a fact. That is it.

Yes. Seenzone is really frustrating sometimes. I also can not stand this. When someone seenzone's me, I try to think that s/he can be busy. I personally seenzone a lot of persons. Not because I want to, always, sometimes it's just I am busy. Then I reply later. There is another reason, If I want to ignore that person so yes, I seenzone him/her. But if someone wants to ignore me, that's okay too. S/he is someone I should ignore too because I have my self respect. Everyone should have too. Self respect is something that helps me in this type of situation.

i think it is very common, if we do not know the reason for a certain action, we keep on thinking about it, especially if the person is important to us. I would say that the best way to deal with it is to directly ask the person for the reason rather than thinking about all sorts of negative things. That way you get clarity and also it saves you from a lot of negative thoughts. Also, one can try to think of positive reasons like eg, they must be busy or have forgotten, rather than negative ones till they reply.

I definitely understand how this would make you feel like you are being ignored. But the way I chose to look at is, a)maybe they got the alert and it is a habit to check it, but they are really busy and will get back to me soon. b) was the message sent really worthy of a direct response? like was a question asked that required an answer? maybe my message was not as direct as I originally wanted it to be. Maybe I need to rephrase what I am saying/asking to make the other person realize I am expecting a response.

This is so common with everyone I know. I, personally am an over-thinker and usually will think of all the other possible negative reason why someone might not have replied to a message, even if the last message I sent does not necessarily warrant a response. Generally, I cope with this anxiety by putting down my device, and moving on with my life, though this also depends on the person I am messaging. For instance, if it is one of my close friends, I will follow up with them, and their reason is usually because they are busy or forgot to reply. If it is someone I am still getting to know, I will just leave it as it is. If they are as invested in communicating with you as you are with them, they will eventually take the time to respond. If not, I just move on because I am positive that there is someone else in your circle that is willing to give me time out of their day to touch base and/or respond. Keep in mind that everyone has a different personality. some people are just "not as good" as messaging as others. For instance, one of my best friends rarely responds to my messages in a timely manner and sometimes may ignore them. They are a completely different in person, and are usually the one who leads the conversation. My other friend is very good at texting and messaging, but in person they are very awkward and shy. Everyone is different, but just make sure that if you do get anxious, put down your device and do something else to distract or calm yourself. Think positively, and try to look at the innocent reasons why someone may not respond to a message, rather than the negative intentional reasons. Remember, you are just as important as everyone else.

I cope by distracting myself. It's always best to try and remember that everyone is doing something and so they may not always be there to answer your message, even if they have seen it. Therefore, I try my best to do something else until they've messaged me back. However, if I feel like they haven't messaged me in a while (normally a day or two of not replying) then I'll message them again to make sure they're alright. Sometimes people see that you've sent them a message while they're in the middle of doing something and so they forget to respond to you, so it may not seem like they're ignoring you.

It used to make me anxious but one day I realized that I did leave people on "seen" and forget to reply sometimes. I do because I have personal and professional emergencies going on which drain all my time and energy and prevents me from chatting afterwards. I do it because I feel low or tired, can't think of anything funny, smart or nice to answer, so I prefer to say nothing. I do so because I am a day dreamer who needs plenty of alone time, no matter how much I love the people in my life, it is just a basic need. I do it because I set boundaries for myself. Any social interaction is tiring to some points, even the ones that seem very chill require energy. I do it because I always want to pay attention to people. I really want to listen carefully and to answer giving 100% of my attention. It is a matter of respect because I care, I take people seriously when they share something with me, so I'd rather not talk at all than being half there, being my own shadow and taking the risk to seem distant or to say something stupid or inappropriate. So when someone leaves me on seen, I just assume that they are like me. It just means they are not available. It has nothing to do with me, it is about them and what they are going through. And it is ok, I won't ad any pressure on them.

Yes, other people do feel this same feeling, you aren't alone with this! It's natural to feel like you aren't good enough or like you have somehow messed up when someone doesn't reply to your message as soon as they've read it. You are more likely to feel this way if you have low self-esteem, talking to a 7 cups listener or a therapist could help you deal with this. Other things that might work for you include reminding yourself of all of the other rational reasons that the person hasn't replied- maybe their phone died, maybe they fell asleep, maybe they got distracted and forget to hit "send". Another thing you can try is explaining to the person that when they don't respond to your messages it makes you feel anxious. I hope this helps. Look after yourself, Emi

Yes, it can usually mean sometimes they're busy or at work and don't know what to reply or they're wondering what to say or trying to figure out what you mean. it can be confusing no doubt. I have no doubt that's how you feel about it. though it can hard to say like man why are just not replying. hopefully this helps you a lot with what you're experiencing. I've experienced this myself. where I'm just scratching my head wondering what's been going on? why haven't I been able to simply get a reply from them. so I feel you.