I harm myself on purpose. I never do it because I need to cope, I do it because I like the pain and like to have something on my body. I know I should stop, but I don't want to. Why is that?

Maybe you need to feel the pain, maybe it helps you to feel you are alive, maybe is better having physical pain than emotional pain

You've done it for a long time and even if you don't do it to cope, you still feel the need to do it. You like the pain and maybe that's someting that makes you feel secure. That's one if the only things that stays the same.

Self harm is a very complex thing, and that is coming from myself as a person who used to struggle with it. I wish I could give you, or believe that others could give you, a magic answer. However, because it is so complex and each of us is unique, it may be worth finding a trusted person who you can talk to in depth about what you are experiencing - Perhaps a counsellor or other therapist - So they can help you through your journey of discovering the reason for this and a way that works for you to solve it.

everyone is different especially when it comets self harm. Some do it for pain release, some do it for the colour, some do it because they like the look of scars and some, like you, like it because of the pain. Because everyone is so different in this sense, you can only ask yourself why because nobody knows you better than you. Even if you can't think of an answer straight away, eventually it will come to you.

you should try to stop mostly because it is not good for you body but I think you do it because you feel like if you are "sick" your family or friends will pay attention to you and understand you need help

honestly, i'm the same. I have no idea, a doctor would say something technical but it doesn't feel that way. Personally I try and keep myself busy, surrounded by tasks which does work. I do get the occasional tattoo. Message me if you would like some-one to talk to about this :)

Your addicted to the pain, and you have found pleasure out of it. There are safer alternatives to this like the pain of a rubber band snapped to your wrist may help.

You don't want to stop because you got used to it. It feels like pain is making you feel or is giving a sign that you are still alive in this world. It is like a drug that if you use it too much, you will get addicted and will continue to use it again and again because it gives you pleasure. I've been there. And I know that someday you will realize your own worth. I know it is hard to stop but trust me, you will get through it because I believe in you, WE believe in you. If I was able to let go then you can do it too, you just need to escape from darkness and reach for the light. You can only save yourself because it's your own battlefield. We are only here to guide you along the way.

When we end up giving in to self-harm, sometimes it becomes a subconscious habit. It buries itself in our brains and becomes our preferred method of coping. And if we let it gain too much power over us, it may become an addiction. Addictions are very difficult to give up. But not impossible. You reached out, which means you care about getting better. You obviously care enough to want to do something. That's your first step. It's okay to talk about it. It's okay that you reached out. And most importantly, you will be okay. If you need someone to talk to about it, I'm here. I want to help you through it, and I can refer you to good coping methods for that issue specifically.

Well, you need to question yourself that when did you start harming yourself?Rewind into your past, and find out what compelled you to harm yourself. And then see, if the reason is worth harming your beautiful body and soul. because each time you hurt yourself, the scar is not left on the body alone, but also on your soil. Maybe, you don't want to stop it because your body has become used to the pain and you have develpoed a habit. Habits, are difficult to overcome but ofcourse not impossible :) Finding alternatives to keep yourself distracted might help! and you are saying you like something on your body, why noy the good things? for eg tattoos, or jewellery or whatever that pleases you

Sometimes, I feel that we mark ourselves because we want recognition, not from other people but from ourselves. It’s like our minds way of recognising that we’re not okay but in a visual way. We don’t want to stop because then we no longer have physical evidence of our pain. Sometimes you gotta listen to your head before you act. Think about the thought you have before every time you feel like self harming, write your thought down on a piece of paper and throw it away, keep distracted. The mind will always be more powerful than a blade, remember that.

First of all- Thank you for your honesty and sharing this with us at 7cups. Like you said, for some people this is a coping mechanism. This may or may not be true for you, but for some people self-harm is a way to externalize their pain inside and make their pain visible and controllable. I would suggest seeking help, even though you do not want to stop, because self-harm can be very dangerous to your health and safety. This may be a way to help you better understand what self-harm is doing for you and healthy ways to move forward.

There are lots of reasons why people engage in self harm, and they don't always make sense to us or those around us. Everything we do in our lives plays some role in the story of who we are, and we get some form of gain from it. Even things which we have classified as bad or unhelpful give us something. So when thinking about why you might be harming yourself, think about what might be happening beforehand, and how harming yourself changes how you're feeling. Then, think if there is anything else that might be able to fill that same role. Talking to a professional therapist might be a good way of unpacking what might be going on for you. Ultimately, you have demonstrated incredible insight in asking this question, and vulnerability in sharing this with our community. Well done you. Best of luck with your journey.

Self harm is a way to release the pain you are going through. You may not do it to cope but instead let out some of your anger at yourself. I use to do it as well, I found when I stopped and that I felt mods confident within myself. It is difficult to give up as self harm can become an addictive thing. I used to harm myself on purpose as well, I have been clean for over 12 months and have tattooed over the areas where I hurt myself. It has made me more confident in the long run to have art instead of scars.

It is likely that you're experiencing an addiction to the pain. Self harm can often cause the release of endorphins, a chemical the helps with stress. The important thing in stopping self harm is to identify what triggers this behaviour, and then to find alternatives. There are many other activities that may cause positive pain, eg. exercise. It is important to find something healthy that you can undertake instead of self harm. Doing this may mean trying a variety of activities that may not work at first and that's totally okay. Have fun with it and take it as an opportunity to try new things!

If you were to meet with a lot of people in my family or circle, you'd see that many of us have multiple tattoos. And its just that! Tattoos can be addictive in some ways. So I think for someone to enjoy that kind of pain, maybe you can channel it into a healthier outlet like tattoos. Otherwise I've noticed that enjoying hurting ourselves can stem from actual self-hate and are trying to find some way to feel.. well anything.. intensely. If that is the case with you, I'd recommend talking to one of the therapists here at 7 cups about how to feel your genuine emotions again!

I am not medically qualified to diagnose anyone and for that reason it would be best if you spoke to a health care professional. However it sounds like an obsessive compulsive disorder from the untrained eye. If you need to do something and cannot prevent yourself from doing so. Also liking the feeling of pain is worrying as to why you are doing this. There is always a reason behind self harm and it may be of benefit for you if you speak with a therapist to identify what your trigger was. If you know you should stop that is a good sign, maybe speak with your doctor about getting support.

People self- harm as a coping mechanism for whats happening in their lives as its the only way they believe thats the only pain they can control and feel helpless. There are many alternatives which are much safer. For example Snap a rubber band against your wrist or Use a red marker pen to draw or write words on the place where you want to cut,Write down exactly how you are feeling in a diary – or if you’d prefer to, just scribble everything out,Take part in high-intensity exercise; like circuit training, boxing, running or swimming,Find somewhere isolated and scream as loudly as you possibly can (alternatively do it into a cushion) whose are just some examples but you should really reach out to a loved one or friend or teacher or parent and tell them how you feel not to hold in in.

It could be related to some sort of trauma caused by any type of abuse, a sign of distress or a way to cope with difficult feelings in life. This issue has to be addressed as soon as possible or it might become a habit and also a risk factor for future suicide attempts. Some people self-harm themselves as a result of some sort of mental illness, but not all people have mental illness, in case they are accompanied by troubling thoughts or feelings it's important that the doctor knows about it, in other less severe cases talking about the problems affecting the patient with a listener is a good approach, writing, practicing relaxation exercises and even talking to friends also.

If you keep returning to something because it gives you comfort in some way, then that is still totally a coping mechanism! For many, physical pain is a distraction from emotional pain. When we experience pain our body also releases endorphins, which lessen the experience of pain and stress and can even result in a "high". Essentially when we self harm we get "happy chemicals" which can become addictive just like a drug that releases the same endorphins. Often times when we seek out the comfort of pain or drugs it is to fill a void or cover up a wound. Ultimately we have to address the wound from which we seeking comfort in the first place to address the unwanted behavior.

When we cause ourselves harm we can control it. It is often a way to take control, because we can not control the world around us. It is also a way to distract from emotional pain, because physical pain is often easier for us to handle than emotional pain. Another reason may be subconscious or unconscious guilt, shame, or anger. Inflicting pain on one's self is a way of punishing for perceived wrongdoing. Some claim it is because of masochism, which is purposeful infliction of pain due to a pleasurable response. But this is more complicated than a simple pain and pleasure relationship. We are wired to avoid pain, so the enjoyment of pain is not simply that, there are underlying drives at play.

You put yourself in a mindset that this harm is doing you good. That type of mindset will ALWAYS be hard to change.. which leads to you not wanting to stop. There are also chemicals harming yourself can release into your brain that makes you feel happier and make you think that harming is a good idea. Due to that, you're going to want to keep doing it. If stopping is what you want to do then getting some help from a therapist or somebody will be amazing. They can help guide you on the right path as you will need to change your whole mindset towards harming yourself etc.

Sometimes punishing yourself is easier than forgiving yourself. It may have to do with something from the past or something you just said. Sometimes I feel I deserve the pain. I don't care about the pity or anger from those around me if they happen to witness and don't understand why I'm turning against myself. It doesn't make me feel better but it feels justified. No matter the way of self harm, it also helps justify your emotional distress when you're not sure why you're struggling. Despite all that, it never stops being terrifying as hell. My experience is on initial levels and while I have felt I should do more, there are also the good days when I'm glad I haven't and scared about what might happen if I let this out of control.

I have struggled with self-harm many times. I know how hard it can be to stop, and sometimes it is hard to admit that you have a problem. I would recommend going to a therapist and getting serious help. Self-harm isn't something to take lightly. It could lead to a lot worse, and it is a very unhealthy coping mechanism. You could also try telling someone you trust how you feel, it can help to not have to go through it alone. Self-harm can also leave permanent scars, I have many, and they look crazy. Try speaking with a therapist and see what they say, but you may need professional help. You're not alone.

you are accustomed to the feeling. you can try to use a rubber band and snap it on your arm as it will give the same effect as self harm. you may enjoy pain in forms where you can see it, but remember there are other ways. if you ever need help, be sure to reach out to a hotline. these are great ways to help cope with anything going on. you are not alone, there are others just like you out there in the world. what matters the most is your safety and health. be sure to reach out

As a person who has gone through a similar situation (I liked the view of blood and the scars/bruises) I understand where those feelings are coming from although I don't understand the feelings themselves. Even if it's physically/aesthetically pleasing, or however one can formulate that, self-harm is never a good idea and the tecnique I can think of id gradual working on avoiding to do it, maybe find something else to replace it (you might develop a less harmful but still toxic tick by accident like chewing nails or peeling off skin). In the end, it's all a process so don't worry if you fall back to self-harm or feel weirdly satisfied with it.

Are you feeling suicidal? And would you like me to refer you to the suicide hotline? Harming yourself is someone serious and it can cause harm to yourself now and in the future. I'm not sure why you don't want to stop. Maybe instead, you can draw on your body with markers. Maybe even sharpie so that it won't come off. Try to draw on yourself or paint on your body so you can see your beautiful art. Self harm is a serious topic, and I only want the best for you. Let me know again, if you'd like a referral to the suicide hotline.

Harming yourself to cope and harming yourself because you like it is fundamentally the same thing. We repeat behaviours because they work and they give us a positive pay-off. You could very well be serving a personal need or value, but the WAY you are choosing to do it (self-harm) is a destructive way to go about it. The question is, is there a way to get the same positive feelings that self-harm provides but through another activity. Is there a substitute you could find? As it stands, self-harm is a double-edged sword. You may indeed gain some value from doing it, but continued self-harm is really bad for your body. The scars will build up and the more you do it the harder it will be to stop. If a day comes when you outgrow the behaviour you will forever have to see the aftermath. Also, self-harm is really scary to people and can be a burden on your interpersonal relationships. It can be extremely stressful to your friends, family, and loved ones. Therefore, it might cause all kinds of problems aside from just physical.

The reason why you do not want to stop is because as you said, you liked the pain. To be honest, the pain you have to carry is so much, you hurt yourself because that will distract you from the problems you are dealing with. I suggest you find something else that will help you relax. For example, do some sports. Boxing, running, where you can reduce stress. Try to feel painful by not hurting yourself but like getting tired of sports. And do not you worry, dear, this will go away. All you have to do, is to put your mind to it. Good luck, honey!

This is a maladaptive coping mechanism, because self-harm is very effective at distracting you from emotional pain quickly, it releases endorphins which make you feel good and it leaves a mark on the body which you can look at later and remember that what you went through was "real", not just you being dramatic. I would strongly suggest getting professional therapy, especially if the self--harm is endangering your health (even if it seems tame now, it can quickly escalate when things get bad in your personal life) This is a conditioned response which CAN be un-learned and replaced with safer/healthier solutions, but it will take time. Self-harm is addictive and you're going to need much support to get through this.