How do you effectively confront people who are spreading negative rumors about you?
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Last Updated: 06/10/2022 at 3:23pm
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Top Rated Answers
If you're feeling hopeless, disinterested in things that you used to enjoy, have suicidal thoughts, etc., then depression seems like the likelier cause and you should contact your doctor to discuss. If you're symptoms are more related to feeling easily offended or "attacked", acute and temporary sadness due to hearing something that's sad, etc., then sensitivity may be to blame. Although it can be easy to confuse the two, depression is a far deeper issue that affects nearly every part of life until it is resolved. If you think that you may be depressed, please speak to your doctor.
Anonymous
February 14th, 2020 4:29am
I would confront them, Asking what I did to them to cause them to bully me/ spread rumors of me.
Anonymous
March 29th, 2020 6:08pm
Talk it through what them. I stay opened minded & listen to both perspectives. For example, when my sister & I get into arguments. I always try my best to listen to her view on things. I try my best to always come to an agreement if I can’t come to an agreement because the other person is too stubborn I’ll just give them space & leave the scenario. I’ll try talking to them later when they are calmer & willing to listen. It can be hard to confront but it is the best way to communicate & alone things
MMmmm. Sometimes I like to take the bull by the horn. I like to ask this people concerned why they seem to think my story is so important that they are spending their precious time spreading it. But I will keep in mind my boundaries on how to speak to them. Confrontations can be done in an amicable way . I need to watch my voice , facial expression , gestures and choice of words. I might even rehearse a little before I actually speak to the people concerned. The bottom line is : Emerge from the confrontation elegantly, gracefully , politely and feel good about yourself. That's empowerment and it would be a fantastic bonus for your growth.
I will admit I don't handle things the best way possible but I have learned from doing it.you have to be strong outgoing and fierce. You also learn to not care what others are saying because it's mostly about how you want to feel and not the other way around. You learn that later in life in the weirdest ways. One day you can be mad at this boy or girl and go off but then you learn to control yourself and you learn how to be a better person. So what let people talk because they hate that the most.
Anonymous
May 16th, 2020 3:57am
I haven’t had to confront anyone regarding rumors, but I have had to confront someone spreading truth. This truth was regarding my private life and my safety. I expressed my concerns and explained how allowing this information to be release effected me emotionally and puts my privacy at a high risk. It was also a matter that involved the safety of my children. Once my concerns were communicated and were confirmed this person understood the circumstances and no longer continued to “spread the rumorâ€. Sometimes a broad upfront approach maybe be the answer. However it might not be for a smaller matter, it could really backfire in other situations. It’s best to take it case by case.
you don’t confront them, you take up the challenge to build a strong mindset & attitude that no matter the rumours thrown at you, you bounce back even stronger. you know you are stronger than negative words, and those people speak hate from a very low place. imagine the amount of bitterness they must have to attempt to tarnish your image. but they will always try to bring you down. you gotta stay in a constant foundation of mind that is strong to block the negativity. focus on the positive. don’t confront to fight, but confront by attitude & silence.
For situations like this it's important to treat it delicately, as you most likely does not want further labeling and rumours. It would be a good idea to find a time when all of you have somewhere to go to talk in private. Try to learn what exactly they're trying to do and, if possible, why they are doing it. Then I'm sure it would be easier to resolve the issue. If everything comes down to it, you may consider talking to authorities, especially the rumours are escalating and are more detrimental to your image/mental health than you can bear. There are always legal actions available as well if it affects your future, career, etc.
Here's a good format to follow:
"Hey, I heard that you guys said ______________ about me, and I'd like to hear your explanation for it."
Being demanding, sassy, or angry will not change anything, Being firm and saying exactly what you want to hear is more effective and lets them know that you mean business.
Besides, standing up to people takes guts and is hard to do. It takes courage for you to confront them. Just remember, don't be mean about it, be confident in what you say and be firm about it. Try not to be too emotional while speaking to them.
Best of luck to you!
Ask them if you can have private talk with them and then ask calmly if they have heard any rumours that someone close to you is talking about you and you want their help to find out who it is so you can speak with them.
What you shouldn't do, is fight back. That just makes more conflict that you have to deal with. Understand why they are spreading rumors about you. It could just be a misunderstanding. But if it isn't, ask the person why they started the rumor. Try to reason with them and figure out unresolved conflict.
Anonymous
July 26th, 2016 12:27am
If people are spreading negative rumors about you, you should find out if they're aware that the rumors thy are spreading about you are false. You should them inform them that the rumors they are spreading about you are false. The third thing is find out their motive.
Anonymous
September 29th, 2016 3:05pm
I will go to that person and ask her whats the problem. I will tell her that i prefer face to face conversation regarding my negatives
Confront them and ask them to stop because you know that they are the ones spreading the negative rumors, and it makes you upset. If they don't stop, report them to a teacher, guidance counselor, or trusted adult.
I will tell him/her personally, with a mediator or a counselor and we'll talk everything out. We would express our sides and iron everything out.
By staying mature, and by understanding that they are only people too, with complex stuff going on. I believe I can talk it out with them.
I tend to try and talk to them about why they started to spread the rumor, or get one of my friends, that is also their friend, to ask why. Then I try to get them to stop by trying to talk to them about it. Because, for me at least, it's because of one of my sensory things I do to keep me grounded, when i feel like i'm disassociating. Then we try to work out a compromise.
Confronting people about negative rumors can be done by approaching them and saying something like, 'I understand there are some rumors going around about me that are untrue. I would really appreciate it, if it would just stop. I do nothing to harm others and would appreciate if the same were done for me.'
Anonymous
January 4th, 2017 5:09am
Confront this person with confidence. If you aren't confident your words will mean nothing to them. Also, deny what they are saying. Tell them what they're saying doesn't bother you, even if it isn't true. Finally, realize yourself that you are so much better than they are because you are confident, and you don't spread rumors about them.
Anonymous
February 5th, 2017 10:53am
I have found that confronting them bluntly is always the better choice, rather than being cagey and shady. You need to have a cool and collected demeanour and not give vent to nasty feelings.
The people who are spreading rumors about you probably don't expect you to confront them at all. Be direct and tell them that you don't appreciate the gossip they are spreading and that they need to stop.
Anonymous
February 26th, 2017 9:18am
Negative rumours are harsh, but do not be harsh to them. Regardless of your anger and frustration, simply ask them to stop. If that does not work, tell the person a story, a story of how the rumours affect you. Rumours are spread with the intent to hurt on a skin level. As soon as the people realise it has sunk deeper than that, they will likely apologise. Remember, do not be harsh to them. It is about forgiveness.
Confronting a person that has been making up rumors about you is an uncomfortable situation for most people. The best way of clearing the air with this person is by approaching them without the intentions of retaliation and being aggressive. This will not achieve much. Identify what you have heard and let them know how this made you feel. Once you have told them why it bothered you, ask them to kindly stop saying mean or hurtful stuff because what there doing is bullying. That tends to stop the rumors being spread but if it continues then best you discuss what's going on with an authoritative figure, or a professional to help resolve the issue
You have to stand up for yourself. Tell them to stop and tell others that it was rumors. And true friends will always believe you and ask you about the rumors when hearing them.
The first thing you should do is know who you are, and know there is nothing those other people might say that would change who you are. Then ask them directly, often people who spread rumors will stop doing so if they are confronted directly, respectfully but with no fear.
Anonymous
April 18th, 2017 9:15am
Approach the people who are spreading rumors in a calm manner. Showing signs of anger, frustation, or hatred can intensify and worsen the situation. Politely asked what they said about you and why they said it, because it isn't true. Once you hear there response, request that they don't do it again and kindly thank them for hearing you out before you leave the conversation.
Tell them to stop spreading rumors about me, or tell the counselor or my parents about it. Or I just do not mind them since what they are saying are not true at all
Anonymous
April 23rd, 2017 4:31am
When confronting people who are spreading negative rumours about me, I start with asking them if they said it. Then I will ask them why and try to come to a solution. If they keep up with the rumors or still act a certain way, I simply ignore it. I know from experience after a while they will move on.
I ignore it for the time being and wait for it to be forgotten, most rumors blow over fairly quickly. If they don't stop after a week or two, politely ask them to stop. If that still doesn't work, notify someone who may be able to help. Although just ignoring them usually works!
In this case it is important so stand up for yourself. Go straight to them and tell them that It hurt you what they were telling about you. You dont't have to explain yourself just make sure that they were doing wrong. I think it is also important to understand what the other person is going trough - maybe their life isn't that great at the moment but you are allowed to feel angry but just be understanding
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