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My ex boyfriend wants to stay friends after breaking up with me, but I'm still trying to heal. What should I do?

9 Answers
Last Updated: 03/28/2022 at 8:46am
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Top Rated Answers
sincereLion3002
December 20th, 2017 1:19am
It's kind of you to be concerned with your ex's desires, but it's okay to listen to your own needs, too. It's completely normal and legitimate to want space after a break up, but in the end this will have to be your decision. Keep in mind, though, that needing time to heal does not mean that you can never be friends. Perhaps you just need some time off or perhaps you are not sure whether you could ever be friends. Either way, I you do want a friendship in the future, you can tell them that you need space now but that you are open to considering friendship in the future.
cslay21
January 29th, 2018 11:50am
take time for you! its okay to need some time to collect and heal from the loss of someone, greiving a partner is like grieving a death from a significant part of your life and if you need some time thats okay and should be respected,
Anonymous
May 29th, 2018 4:50pm
Healing yourself should be your first priority, give time to yourself and discover yourself. You can start over once you're sure and have healed on your own.
Jenna
June 1st, 2021 12:55am
Taking the time to sit back and reflect on the break-up and how it makes you feel can help with healing. The best thing is to be open and honest with him. Communicating you need time to heal first can help you take the time and process to do so, and help him understand where you're at with the situation, and can help avoid him feeling pushed away. Take time to heal and think about how you want to continue having him in your life. I hope everything works out for you and you're able to heal from this break-up.
Miaxu
March 28th, 2022 8:46am
Setting healthy boundaries is a must. Do what's right for you, your mental health and overall wellbeing. Taking time to heal and be your best self is not selfish, and will benefit you in the long run. It's good that you can recognise when your mind and body need a break, and when you need to heal. I truly hope that your ex partner respects these boundaries, remember that if he doesn't - it is completely valid to take measures to either restrict his access to you, or cut him out entirely. Make sure to listen to your mind and body, and recognise when you need a break. Best of luck!
Anonymous
January 16th, 2018 11:36pm
I would say that for now, you should say no to being friends. From personal experience- it turned out terribly. I know that with my ex, he turned what happened as friends against me when talking about our relationship and vice versa. I mean, it's great to hold onto those good memories and to maybe relive some of the emotions but, and especially if you're still healing, it won't work out too well. Good luck with everything going on in life :)
Anonymous
June 26th, 2018 3:44am
Tell him you do not wish to be friends right now, you need personal time to heal and be by yourself.
Anonymous
July 9th, 2018 1:08pm
Your health matters the most. it's important that you give yourself the space and time to heal correctly. Be honest with him.
Anonymous
July 19th, 2021 1:39am
Simply tell him. in relationships communication is key. whether in a relationship/friendship communication is a must. just be bold & respectful and I'm sure he'd more than understand your wishes. it's also very important to take care of yourself, even though he wants to stay friends, if you need to heal I think you should take your time and get through whatever you got going on, only you know just how much you're really hurting, so please take care of yourself. I hope things work out well for you. and if you ever wish to talk to a listening ear, remember 7 cups is a place where you distress.