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Claudette Pretorius, MA Counselling Psychology
Licensed Professional Counselor
I know how overwhelming it can feel when you're having a tough time. I offer clients a space that is non-judgemental and empathetic whilst navigating these times together.
Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
August 12th, 2015 5:30am
The capacity to be alone is the capacity to love. It may look paradoxical to you, but its not. It is an existential truth: only those people who are capable of being alone are capable of love, of sharing, of going into the deepest core of another person-- without possessing the other, without becoming dependent on the other, without reducing the other to a thing, and without becoming addicted to the other. They allow the other absolute freedom, because they know that if the other leaves, they will be as happy as they are now. their happiness cannot be taken by the other, because it is not given by the other.
Yes, it is completely fine to be single forever. As much as everyone wants their lives to have a "Happily ever after", it generally doesn't happen. A large amount of people in the world remain single forever, yet they can be some of the happiest people alive. 7 cups isn't about giving false hope, it's about helping people cope with reality, and that's what a single person has to do; learn to be happy with what they have. With a strong group of friends and family and possibly a pet, being single forever is not a bad thing, and is most certainly okay.
Its better to remain single and enjoy your life then to live with someone who made you feel alone and single.
This is a question I ask myself. Is it okay to be single forever? And the answer is what I feel about it. For me, it is perfectly okay to be single forever. When I am happy with my choice and I have other things in my life to look forward to my decision to be single is validated. For instance I practice theatre and creative writing. These two spaces enable tremendous amount of creative freedom and emotional satisfaction. Theatre provides me the opportunity to meet new people. I am able to interact and understand people at an emotional level and the decision to be single gives me all the space I want. I suppose I am like the hermit crab hiding happily under a rock. I am my own boss. I don't have to see emotional dramas on a day to day basis. I don't have to complicate my life wondering what my girlfriend or wife is thinking about and if I have hurt them somewhere. The complexities of relationships are miles away. Life is peaceful, straightforward and mine for the taking. I look younger, happier and well rested. Of course, there is a lot of interest when I mingle with people but I draw happy boundary lines around me. Being single is a choice and the pros outweigh the cons. I'd rather be single and happy and not in a relationship and upset. Three cheers to that.
It's completely okay! However, if you remain single out of personal preference, make sure that you're doing it for healthy reasons - not fear or insecurity. If you don't want to be single but currently are and worry that you might never find someone, don't lose heart! Continue to live your life, pursue fulfilling experiences, grow as a person, develop friendships when you have the opportunity to, and practice loyalty and commitment with your friends - that way, when the right person comes along, you'll be ready for a healthy relationship with that person. And never settle for an unhealthy relationship just to make the singleness go away! :)
Of course it is. If you see yourself happier that way, then why not? Prioritize on what you want for yourself. You don't have to go with the crowd because the crowd isn't always heading the right way.
It's more than okay to be single forever. If you have a good, loving,positive relationship with yourself you may find you're single longer or happy the way you are. This may come from just having the best possible relationship with yourself. Not always, but often people may feel they only feel complete when with someone. I say lets feel whole on our own, not because of someone else.
There's no worse feeling than wasting a lot of time on the wrong person. Sometimes, a bad experience with one partner can put you off wanting another partner. Life can change so drastically without you realising it, and maybe you will want to be in a relationship. Maybe you'll never want to be in a relationship. Neither is wrong. Go with your heart and live life for you.
There's no set formula to a "perfect" life; if you find your own happiness, then you are succeeding.
It's perfectly fine to be single forever. You don't need a boyfriend/girlfriend or a husband/wife to be happy in life. Just be yourself and it will all be okay in the end, no matter what happens.
I think yes, if you haven't found someone who is compatible with you. It is much better to be single than to be with the wrong person. It can ruin your happiness.
The concept of being single expresses the need to feel fulfilled only by a partner. When we feel that the only way our life will truly have meaning is to be able to paired with someone else, we lose the real purpose of fulfilling our happiness in life. So is it okay to be single forever? If that means is it okay to feel happy and complete without someone else beside you to fulfill the social normalcy then yes. It is perfectly okay because you are living life for yourself and not being held down by the barriers that relationships bring upon us.
Yes! Romantic relationships are not an indicator of a fulfilled life. Relationships do not interest everyone, and more times than not, being single is better than expending energy in an unhappy relationship. Being single means that you have learned to be independent and emotionally stand on your own. Society has conditioned us to believe that our happiness is dependent on being with our "soulmate" but that's simply not true. Although it may not always feel like it, you have more power than anyone else to make yourself happy. Use your singledom to get to know yourself and learn to appreciate yourself. Then you’ll be perfectly fine if you never meet someone, and your relationship with others will be better if you do.
I think the most important thing about life is the legacy you're going to leave. What are you going to do that will impact the world? Sometimes you need to be single in order to make an impact. Be satisfied in who you are, and be who you were meant to be. Your legacy is putting your stamp on the future. It’s a way to make some meaning of your existence and to be remembered. You don't need a significant other in order to create your legacy.
No, it's not okay to be single forever, because everyone needs one constant person to be there for you in times of crisis.
Anonymous
July 2nd, 2015 5:45pm
It is definitely okay to be single forever. It just means that you are comfortable with who you are and you don't "need" a special person in your life to validate yourself.
That being said, you ARE only 14. You may find someone who you feel is worthy of spending a lot of time with in the future, but if you don't, it's not a big deal. Enjoy life!
Why not? Who dictates the rules? Who says what's to be done? Only you can determine that for yourself. Sometimes we tend to assimilate what those around us want of us (i.e. to be married/to have kids/to be a certain kind of person we are not) rather than really feel what we want. Guess what? It's fine to be single! It's fine to want to be single. it's also fine to change your mind at some point, if someone comes along that you might find interesting enough to change your mind.
Anonymous
July 22nd, 2015 12:19am
If you are happy being single then there is absolutely NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT! It is way better than being in a relationship that you are not happy in...
Of course and it is okay to be single forever. You don't need a man or a woman to be happy, you need people who care and if you have them, nothing is stopping you from being happy. I have met plenty of people who have been single their whole life and they are some of the best people i have ever met because they have a great personality, you don't need anyone.
Anonymous
June 18th, 2015 7:50pm
It's the best thing! You are free! You don't have anything stopping you from all the stupid crazy stuff you always want to do, feel young and wild and most of all to be yourself;)
Anonymous
January 12th, 2015 12:57am
Yes, that is totally okay. I guess the important part is "Are you okay with being single forever?" If you are, then there's nothing wrong with that :)
It is absolutely 100% okay to be single forever. As much as society puts pressure on us to find a significant other, true happiness is found inside yourself. Yes, it is definitely okay to be single forever.
It should be OK to do whatever you feel like doing! Society is too much based in general rules, forgetting each individual is unique. Don't rush looking for love. Enjoy the moment and if you feel comfortable this way, just keep doing it! Love yourself !
You can be single for as long as you want as long as that makes you happy. If being in a relationship stresses you out too much and you don't like someone hogging all the food in the pantry, then by all means, you are able to be single forever.
Anonymous
July 8th, 2015 11:16pm
It is perfectly normal to want to be single. I prefer being single. However, If you think you will be forever alone because nobody will like you, please do not crave the approval of others. You are beautiful because you are unique.
Many people e.g. monks and priests choose to be single forever. It is perfectly okay to be single forever if you choose to be. Most people see those around them in couples, getting married, settling down and having children etc and this peer pressure can exert an invisible additional force on us to do the same. Peer pressure is the single most powerful social force out there but yes, if you choose to be single it is perfectly fine and you should live confidently with your decision and not beat yourself up about it.
Anonymous
August 17th, 2015 1:34pm
It is perfectly fine to always be single. Most societies do have that pressure for people to get married, start a family etc. but it is all about personal preference. If you do not want a relationship and prefer not being in one, then sure go ahead and do that, as long as you are living the life that makes you the happiest.
If your happy with being single now then yes its ok. If you happy being single in 10 years then yes its ok. Its a personal choice.
Yes it is very okay to be single forever if that's what you want. Some people opt for a celibate life or choose not have a partner and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. As long as you're happy then go for it!
Anonymous
March 15th, 2016 7:56am
Yes. Being single doesnt equate loneliness. You may be married but still feel lonely or you may be single but feel completely happy and loved.
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