When Asked for Advice

Empower the person in finding their own path forward.

Why don't we give advice? 

Have you ever tried to talk to someone hoping you'll be heard and supported, but instead received unwanted advice? 

Giving advice takes away a person's space to talk and express themselves. It also removes an opportunity to figure out their own solutions and build self-confidence. 

Additionally, you can never know every detail of a situation, or be an expert in the many different issues people come to talk about. Well-meaning advice may be unhelpful or even damaging.

What should I say if someone asks for advice?  

• Show you trust in their ability to work this out, e.g. "You are the expert on your situation. I can't give advice, but I can listen and help you figure out your path forward." 
• Help them to think about things from another point of view, e.g. "What would you say to a friend who was in your situation?" 
• Guide them to look inside themselves for the answer, e.g. "What do you feel like you should do?"  

Should every chat end with a solution? 

No. It is absolutely okay for a person to leave a chat without a solution to their problems. Even if they don't seem happier after a chat, you've still done something powerful in giving them that space and time.