People Around You Influence Your Confidence Levels 

 

One big part of becoming confident is learning how to add good people to your life and learning how to lessen exposure to people that are harmful.
 

Imagine yourself as a circle and other circles connected to you. You have control of these circles. If someone is kind and positive, then increase the size of their circle and bring them in closer. If someone is negative, then you can shrink their circle and place their circle further away.
 

Some people feel afraid or like it is against the rules to shrink another person's circle. It isn't! It is totally up to you. This doesn't mean you need to tell the person or risk having a fight with them. Simply decrease - on purpose - the amount of words you use when you talk or text with them. Gradually dial it back. You'll be surprised to see that this helps you feel better and leaves you with more energy.

 

Some people are stormy

People bring their own weather into your world. If your personality is normally sunny, yet every time Stacy comes around it becomes dark and rainy, then know the gray clouds have nothing to do with you. When you meet a new person, simply allow yourself to get a feel for their weather. If you like it, then let them into your circle. If you don’t like it, then don’t let them in.

We all have cloudy days and that is okay. The key thing is to notice whether or not the person’s weather is consistently negative. If it is, then you have every right to guard yourself.

 

Don't pick up the rope!

When you are learning to minimize contact with people that are hurting your confidence it is okay to just ignore the hooks, rope, or bait. Simply don't pick up the rope. Walk right past it and smile as you continue to grow your confidence!

 

Choose your friends wisely!

There are a couple of old sayings: You hang out with friends who go to jail, you go to jail. You hang out with friends who go to Yale, you go to Yale.

Choose your friends VERY wisely!

 

The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior

People will say a lot of things to you but the key thing you want to look at is their behavior. Behavior is much harder to fake. Sometimes people get at this idea by saying "talk is cheap."

A person might say a lot of nice things to you, but look at how they have treated you in the past. That is the best way to determine how they will treat you in the future.

On the other hand, you might have someone that isn't saying a lot to you, but they are reliably there for you and are generally a good person. They might be less fancy than the talker referenced above. If they've been consistently good to you in the past then they'll likely be good to you in the future.

 

The Power of Mentors | Knowing/Feeling that People Believe in You!

I had some tough challenges growing up. One thing that helped get me back on the right track were mentors. These are people that looked out for me and helped me see myself in a different way. They believed in me. They rooted for me. Then, step by step, I gradually learned to trust their perception over other less than positive voices in my life. I internalized their faith in me and it helped me grow stronger.

At 7 Cups, we have mentoring baked into the system. The whole community rallies and believes in you. We want you to feel that and know that when you are on 7 Cups. We believe in you. Our team believes in you. Our leaders believe in you. Our listeners believe in you. Our members believe in you.

Say it to yourself: “The community believes in me. Their belief helps to lift me up when I'm struggling. They are rallying behind me and believing the very best for me. They are championing me and walking alongside me as I get stronger!”

 

 

The Complete Growth Path here