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Patriot profile picture
Caretaker Burn Out
by Patriot
Last post
9 hours ago
...See more I'm just so spent.  My husband and I have been taking care of my 90 year old mother for the past 4 years.  We've not had a vacation or a weekend away for 4 years. My husband is retired and I still work, so he takes care of Mom during the day and I take over when I get home from work and on the weekends.   Prior to my mom's illness (osteoarthritis-unable to move around unassisted but can still walk) we were very close. We enjoyed each other's company and had fun together. Since she became ill, I've seen a very different side to her. She's overly dramatic with her symptoms, demanding, unreasonable and mean.  She was tested for dementia and the results were she just has age related memory issues but not dementia. It's her attitude that has gotten me so down. She used to be fun, we (my husband and I) loved taking her places, taking her on trips with us, dinners etc... But now she is a bitter, ugly old woman who finds fault with all we do for her. If I clean her bathroom, she'll point out small specks I may have missed, we buy her good quality food, she won't eat it (we've wasted so much money on food for her that she says she likes, then won't eat), complains she wants socks, when we buy her socks she finds fault and won't wear them, the same with shoes & slippers. The list goes on and on.  Both my husband and I are just mentally exhausted. We have no help (can't afford Visiting Angels and we have no family nearby). We can't go anywhere to get away from her.  The only time we get a break is when she is sleeping.   I'm tired all the time, depressed, no motivation and feel hopeless.  My husband, while being a great support, feels the same. No energy, no motivation to do anything. We both feel like we're being held hostage by an ungrateful shrew who is determined to make us feel as miserable as she is and she is succeeding.  She cannot afford to go into a nursing home and my husband is old school and feels since we're her only family (both my brothers have passed in the last 10 years and my father passed 22 years ago) we need to keep her at home as long as we can.  Her doctors are not much help. They just want to put her on antidepressants (she refuses to take them).  Aside from that, they just take her temp, do her labs and send her out the door until next year.  I just needed to vent.  I never anticipated this happening to a woman who was so full of life and had such a great outlook. I also never anticipated how miserable and defeated I would end up feeling at this stage in my life. I see no hope for the future. 
SweetLynn profile picture
Happy but standing in the middle
by SweetLynn
Last post
12 hours ago
...See more i am a mom to a Beautiful 26 old mentally handicapped daughter whom has Asperger's syndrome (autism) ADHD, developmentally delayed she has 26 but a mindset of an 8 to a 10 year old. I am her only parent her dad died in 2022.. she has older brothers that lives in a different state. she is a Aunt to 4 beautiful girls.. its hard to do it all by yourself with no help .. sometimes I am over joyed other times i just want to pull the rest of my hair out . i feel guilty for feeling the way I do i want to talk to people at my church but I am super scared of being judged or looked down on .. this is so hard I absolutely love my daughter with all my being just I am feeling so alone....𥹠it doesn't help that I have heart disease type 2 Diabetes and Parkinson's ð¥º
SweetSugarBoost profile picture
Having an issues
by SweetSugarBoost
Last post
12 hours ago
...See more My sister is 12. When things don't go her way, she gets petty and upset. Today, she took one of my figurines and did something with it. I can't find it and it's one that doesn't fall (and if it does it's usually on my bed). I know the youngest didn't take it because he tells us that he did it once we notice. She on the other hand will lie until it's about forgotten and will slip up on it. I did confront her and told her that I do not like that. That it's not nice not right for her to do that just because she's mad and didn't get her way. Bringing up the phrase "Treat people how you want to be treated". I'm genuinely very upset and disappointed because I trusted them to not touch my stuff or do me dirty like that since I don't do that to them either. They know I don't mind it as long as they ask or tell me and put it back. I make sure to do the same. At the moment, I'm letting my anger settle and I'll retalk with her another time. What more can I do, especially to not escalate the situation?
modestSea4773 profile picture
Looking for a mommies group
by modestSea4773
Last post
20 hours ago
...See more Looking to find a few mommies with elementary school kids to make a little support group. I have one suspected autistic kid. I could use some help and support regarding that matter too. I just want a group of moms who can relate to each other. I have no friends or support system. It would be nice if I had something like that.
delightfulUnicorn38 profile picture
family bucket list 2025
by delightfulUnicorn38
Last post
3 days ago
...See more  Every new year give a chance to start  a fresh and plan amusant things to do with the kids., you can  create a Family Bucket List together   and put down all the fun things you want to do , you could  Take inspiration from the list below and add new ideas as you like Be 1.     Kind to each other 2.     Brave when you need to be 3.     More helpful around the home Try  1.     To keep your room clean (that includes Mum & Dad!) 2.     To visit somewhere cultural   3.     To read a classic   play 1.     A family board game   2.     Cards together 3.     The musical instrument you have or learn a new one Create       1.     A herb garden 2.     Memories from special days  3.     A list of new things you would like to try during the year  
PeggyMeghan111 profile picture
Family
by PeggyMeghan111
Last post
January 9th
...See more My mum and my siblings are the one supposed to care for me but whenever I ask for help they are not able to support me
romasgirl profile picture
hello
by romasgirl
Last post
January 9th
...See more hello, i joined this group because i needed to talk about my family, my mom is verbally abusive, my brother is physically abusive and my sister too. i dont know how to deall with it all
ambitiousNectarine1515 profile picture
Bipolar spouse
by ambitiousNectarine1515
Last post
January 8th
...See more My husband is bipolar im trying desperately to find someone in the same position to talk to
oliveSailboat9838 profile picture
Stuck between parents
by oliveSailboat9838
Last post
January 6th
...See more Trigger warning : sensitive topics I learned about mental health, care and improvement not so long ago, and it was a breath of fresh air for someone who was always told to stock my feelings and invalidante them with " it's not that deep"and gaslighting. I currently struggle with procrastination and feel so lost... I just feel like I have nowhere to go, because both my parents are toxic and narcissistic. But in a different way. While my mom yells and hit us all the time, my dad instead always plays the victim, yells and say insults when other people are not here, is "the greatest father" in front of others. I'm stuck between two houses, one where my mom don't want me to go anymore because of how I " went crazy" , another one where my dad lowkey tells his family I'm not supposed to be here. All of this, while my relationship with my little sister just gets worse because I feel guilty for not telling her things she has to know, I feel so vulnerable! All I want is somebody to help me and hear me. I did have a therapist when my dad tried to que my mom for child abuse, then when she wanted to meet them both, he started getting angry and putting his anger on me. My grandma ( who used to always support me) agreed with him, saying a man, wouldn't have to deal with children. He also said some terrible stuff to me. This is too much. Like, how is this normal? So what if some children live through war? Don't I have the right to live a healthy life, with respectful people? I went through years of depression, it all was getting better, and know this?
lazy404 profile picture
Difficult mom
by lazy404
Last post
January 6th
...See more Before we proceed, I should state that my mom and I don’t have a great relationship with each other, as in her very presence pisses me off. So there’s a slim chance a heart to heart conversation will be a solution. But: I’m African, and it has been ingrained in my head to always respect my parents etc etc. so you can imagine how hard it is to speak my mind most of the time. Anyway, this is the current issue that brought me here: tonight I was supposed to hang out with friends, but i usually drive my mom to work at night. So I asked her to take an uber this time, but she said she didn’t have money for one. So I offered to pay, and here came this insufferable act of hers. She started going off, spazzing about how I’m making it a habit of always going out, and that I went out for New Year’s Eve so there isn’t any reason to go out again and that I don’t see her going out often. So now I’m wondering if I should just go out anyways and call uber for her when she’s ready or just let it go and try to move out soon. I should also point out I’m 22 years old but unfortunately I think I’ve been conditioned so it’s hard for me to not listen to her.
CDanielle profile picture
Caregiving ups and downs
by CDanielle
Last post
January 5th
...See more Hi there! I take care of my blind father with dementia and my wheelchair bound mother, all by myself. They can do a lot for themselves still, amazingly, yet needless to say Im stressed. I need my own job too, but no time. They take care of my needs for now. I have pretty severe anxiety so its not like Im one of those lucky people who are energizer bunnies with a gusto for life, though I do love my life. I am trying and it is my kitties, my fur babies, that keep me going when it gets hard. I so much wish to find others who are in or have been in, similar situations. Thank you for listening. :-)
Fatmaisasoup profile picture
The problem of my life.
by Fatmaisasoup
Last post
January 4th
...See more My family got divorced and I am two years and until now I can't forgive the person who was the reason for their marriage. But I don't have more words to say, but those who have gone through the same experience, I wish they would tell me what to do, because I don't know how to concentrate on any need of thinking, and I became very sensitive and cry easily from accumulations.

Family & Caregivers


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