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Attention All 35+! Join your 24/7 Group Chat today!
by ASilentObserver
Last post
 September 30th
...See more Hello community, We are excited to announce that we are opening 35+ group chat as an exclusive 24/7 chat group, just for those of us who are 35 and over w.e.f Monday, April 22, 2024. This is a space to connect with others in your age group, share experiences, have meaningful conversations, and build a supportive community to encourage and empower each other. To ensure this group remains a safe space for everyone, the chat will be badge-locked. This means only users who have their age as 35 or over will be able to access the group chat.  Here's what makes this group special: * 24/7 access: Keep the conversation flowing, day or night! * Exclusive community: This group is badge-locked, ensuring only users 35 and over can join, fostering a space tailored to your life stage. * In-depth discussions: Dive into meaningful conversations on topics you care about. A few group chat guidelines to keep in mind: * Respectful Communication: Let's all treat each other with kindness and courtesy. * Positive Vibes: We encourage uplifting and engaging conversations. * Life Experiences: Share your wisdom, stories, and support. * Open-mindedness: Be receptive to different perspectives. * No Spam: Let's keep the chat focused and respectful. Let’s join and participate. Please spread the word to your 35+ friends and invite them to participate with you in the group chat for some supportive & meaningful conversations. 
Weekly Prompt #1: What are some unexpected challenges and triumphs you've encountered in your 30s and beyond?
by ASilentObserver
Last post
 July 26th
...See more Welcome to 35+ Community,  As we navigate through our 30s and beyond, life presents us with unexpected challenges and triumphs that shape our experiences and perceptions and define who we are. These years bring a unique set of experiences and test our resilience, patience and push us out of our comfort zones, and ultimately lead to personal growth. Let's explore and share some of the surprising obstacles and victories that many of us encounter during this stage of life. Question of the week: What are some unexpected challenges and triumphs you've encountered in your 30s and beyond? Please share and discuss together. Also, you can join us in 35+ group support chats [https://www.7cups.com/chat/?c=mmdmeXyUkeJO45VriIjD] for live discussions and exploration as well.  Click here to join! [https://www.7cups.com/chat/?c=mmdmeXyUkeJO45VriIjD]
Marriage
by KapitalK
Last post
 4 hours ago
...See more How is everyone in their marriage? Are you okay? Are you appreciated? Most importantly, are you loved?
Friendless
by Naturepixie81
Last post
 4 hours ago
...See more I am 43 and I don’t have any friends. I lost all friends when I left my home town in 2021😢
Coping with poverty
by Drum2089
Last post
 16 hours ago
...See more How do you adapt to hard times alone? I made poor choices as a minor and young adult.
Dealing with the lows…
by Trex1983
Last post
 21 hours ago
...See more I’m feeling so low today. Today should have been a good day, I went with my family to see a public fireworks display for bonfire night (UK), but before we went, feeling low and having negative thoughts and feelings, I asked my wife to tell me one thing she liked about me. Instead of telling me one thing, she berated me about all of things she had done and endured this weekend that I think as a loving partner we should do for each other. She didn’t tell me anything that she liked about me, instead at the end, she told me “Right now, there’s nothing I like about you”. We went to the display, seconds before getting out of the car, I saw WhatsApp open on her phone (in her hand), with a message from a number (not a name, why would she be messaging someone that isn’t in her phone book?)… the last message “You too 🥰” to which she’d reacted to the message with a ❤️ she quickly swiped it off and I didn’t see anymore. Back story, she’d been cheating on me, I found messages on her *** messenger, but in the messages they’d moved the conversation to WhatsApp, and she had deleted his number previously so I’ve never been able to see what she’s messaging him on WhatsApp. Everything in my head was struggling to come up with any explanation other than, they’re messaging again. I walked the 40 minutes to display with tears slowly rolling down my face as I walked, holding little boys hand. Nobody noticed, nobody cared, and I couldn’t hold them in. Throughout the night, I managed to find that she had been messaging our niece to wish our nephew a happy birthday. They hadn’t spoken in over a year and didn’t have her number. I do have her number and verified it was who she said it was, but if she hadn’t been secretive and I had seen more of the messages, I wouldn’t have gotten so low. Fast forwards a few hours, we’re in bed. I get no intimacy, no touch from her anyway, and the dog jumps on the bed. The dog that she always says to leave her alone, he smells etc. I’m the dog person, he’s my dog. She starts hugging and cuddling with the dog… waaayyyy more contact than she would do with me, and I’m back to this low again. I know that both of these are jealousy, and that they’re probably hitting me when I’m already feeling down, but my big question is how do you/I manage these feelings. Control them instead of them controlling me? I’ve never had this problem until I found out about her cheating, and other than dealing with grief of losing my parents I’ve never been depressed until finding out about it either. I tried reaching out to my GP for help, they did nothing. I’d hoped that they could give me something to just take the edge off so that I could start healing. It’s so hard to show someone affection and love when you feel so down about them. Is there a technique that you use to manage this? I always remember training on dealing with anxiety for public speaking and a technique to bring adrenaline down was to occupy your consciousness with 2 things, your brain can’t subconsciously cope with a third, and the tool was to focus on a feather that you’re holding in front of your face and to blow on it to make it wave steadily. The tool in that instance really does work and takes away the nerves. So I guess I’m wondering if there are any words of wisdom, tips or tools that can help to just take my mind away from that place when I’m feeling like this until I’m ready to process it. thanks in advance if there are any such tips
Has Any Relationship Survived Infidelity?
by zeetee17
Last post
 1 day ago
...See more I'm in couples therapy trying to deal with my spouse's affair. Long story short, we hit a rough patch last summer and he cheated on me. We've been in couples therapy since Jan 2022 but I found about the affair in April. It destroyed me. He's been doing everything he can to show me he's changed but I'm still so bitter and feel so much hate and rage towards him. I feel like imhave bad ptsd from this, I have such bad depression over the affair and anxiety over the future with him. He's so different now, is going to therapy to be a better man, but I resent it had to come to this for change to happen. Has anyone ever managed to heal with their partner after something like this?
Hello
by PoohBear197676
Last post
 1 day ago
...See more I havent been on in a long time cause I been trying to help myself and family. Npw I am back
Lonely without him
by solitarysoul0306
Last post
 2 days ago
...See more I'm in my early 40s, single, successful, independent working woman. I live with my parents. They're supportive of every decision I make and whatever I do. In life, I have nothing to complain except for my 'Love Life' :( I've never found myself getting involved in a relationship. During my student years, I noticed how some boys would lie and break trust in relationships, and that led me to decide not to pursue one. I've turned down countless boys who approached me. Some of them have had good intentions but I never felt the spark. Five years ago, I fell in love with a married man who is now the love of my life. (I never intended to get involved with a married man but he reached out and made me fall for him. He loves me genuinely and I know it by heart.) He has a family. His wife and kids, whom he loves deeply, are always his top priority. However, my love for him is so strong that I've chosen to stay in this unconventional relationship, even though I often feel out of place. But, we are both trying to make it work. I have no regrets for falling for him out of no where at this age. I know he is the one I've always always waiting for. He's everything a man should be. However, the emotional baggage that comes with being involved with a married man is subconsciously creating resentment within me, leading to years of emotional pain that I’ve been carrying alone. He is such a great partner, he cares for me in every possible way. He makes an effort to be there and share in my feelings, but I've never been able to communicate this pain to him effectively. Whenever I attempt to discuss it, I’m overwhelmed by a storm of anger and resentment. His ignorance regarding my wishes and the pain I feel about this issue breaks my heart. Two weeks ago, these feelings once again overwhelmed me, and I couldn’t bear the pain I’ve been carrying alone for years. I decided to break up with him and walked away. He hasn’t even reached out to me in the past two weeks, leaving me to walk away. I feel so helpless, so alone, and so empty without him. It’s heart-wrenching. I feel like my heart will explode out of my chest. For the past two weeks, I haven’t stopped shedding tears for a single day. The pain of losing him is so intense that it feels physical; I’m experiencing chest pain, my nerves feel blocked, and sometimes I struggle to breathe. But this time, I can't find the courage to go back. I don’t know what to do or how to cope. Can anyone help me pease ?
Boundaries
by Lenaye8
Last post
 Friday
...See more one thing that sometimes is hard to enforce yet is hugh key needed for mental health and clarity. Last night me and my sister set a boundary. Mine hands down is if I am sleepy do not ask me to come outside, my innerg is low due to lack of sleep since my days have become longer with studying. Take that into cnsideration that my time frame now is different than before. My leisure is when I give my self that outside of my motherly duties. That our kids are into two diff age groups so follow suit. Since my sister is older/ has more freedom now to explore life I told her go out and enjoy ya life frfr. If I do go out wye have to be fully awake or have my own funds to get home. Right now I am still securing a consistent job while doing yoga gigs. It is the slow pace start right now, so I do not burn out. We both have to be mindful of how our life is flowing now. That is the part my sister tends to miss when we talk. *Exhales* the big difference is she has a car and I am saving for mine. My days are longer on foot/metro so my body pushes out more innerg than being in a car. Yes my health is great yet my feet hurt!! Eyem glad we had that talk cuz eye rather go out when I want to not just b/c she want’s my company on her time.
What’s wrong with me?
by fearlessBalloon7756
Last post
 October 28th
...See more I ask myself this everyday for the past year. I am 41/m, professional, 2’nd marriage , 2 kids, living in a nice house, great income. These are the best years of life…. so why am I so miserable? been in and out of therapy struggling with Unaffectionate , unsuspportive partner fantasize about wanting to live the most out of life is it wrong to stay in it for the lifestyle? The kids? I may add to this post but this is my struggle….
Confused
by neonNest5995
Last post
 October 28th
...See more A bartender was at a community event where Iive. Bartender asked if my girlfriend and Icould help him drop off his stuff at his bar via Uber. When the car came she was going to sit in the backseat with him until I told her twice no front seat. The bartender and her were talking a lot to the point it appeared they were flirting in my face and asked if I should get out the car so they can continue flirting. He said no one is flirting. Am I over thinking?
Name 1 positive thing that you did today for yourself
by Hopey9831
Last post
 October 25th
...See more Hey!  I'm back.... ha ha, after a long hiatus.  Anyhow, the blues got to me and a bit of anxiety here and there and everywhere.   Thank you everyone for your participation in the previous post of 'Name 1 positive thing that happened to you'. As the 1 positive thing that happened to you is kind of passive and that you don't have any control over what happens to you, I'd like to start "Season 2" of the "Name 1 thing" series with 'Name 1 positive thing that you did today for YOURSELF' and this places full control in your hands.  This way you can choose to focus on yourself to love and care for yourself a little bit more today.   Once again, let me start the ball rolling.  I've read a chapter of the book by Howard Marks ; 'The most important thing' to expand my knowledge. I haven't been reading consistently and am always distracted by many other distractions hence, this is, I feel, the 1 positive thing I did for myself today.  Feel free to blabber.... 😀
Name 1 positive thing that happened to you today
by Hopey9831
Last post
 October 25th
...See more Hi ya everyone.  In the midst of all the challenges we face in life, sometimes, we cannot help but think in 1 direction ; negative or down.  It's tough I guess, to see things from another perspective, but this is the precise reason why we need to change our focus from the negative to neutral and hopefully, positive ultimately.   I hope this post can gently pivot your ingrain negative perspective, by just asking you for 1 positive thing that happened to you today.  Come and write in every day, that 1 positive thing.  Let's cheer and support our fellows, by liking, hearting their list.  May the force be with you today and every day to come.   

Welcome to the 35 and over community!  Our aim is to provide an inviting space for those of us who are over 35 to find like-minded people, discuss our concerns, and reminisce over a cup of tea  :)   


(Adults), Join us in the Thirty-Five & Over Room every Wednesday! 

Would you like to be added to the Tag List?  Please reply to this thread Here

Our ever-growing support team are here to help you with any questions, so feel free to send us a message :)  Interested in joining the team?  Please PM 7cups.com/@MistyMagic

Please respect others' opinions, even if we strongly disagree. There is no right or wrong answer here. Please avoid conflict or arguments. 

Thank you!

Community Guidelines

The following are the guidelines which are specific to the 35 & Over Community. We ask you to follow them, as well as the Forum Guidelines. Their purpose is to ensure a safe and supportive environment for everyone.

The main goal of this sub-community is to offer support and a space to share and socialize, for the 7 Cups users who are 35 years old, or older. After reaching a certain age, people have specific life concerns that might not be shared by people who don't have as much life experience.
However, age isn't a requirement to participate in our sub-community.

All Adults are welcome!


However, please understand that teens as young as 13 years old can access these forums, so please keep topics appropriate.

So please:
- Reach out for support from your member account
- Offer support as a member or listener
- Be respectful to everyone
- Add a trigger warning  [TW] if your topic needs it
- Take care of yourself
- Take care of others
- Have fun!


 

For more detailed information about how to behave in the forums and in 7 Cups in general:

Community Guidelines
Member Reputation
Listener Reputation

 

Read the 7 Cups Guidelines
Community Resources

Welcome to the 35 and over community!  Our aim is to provide an inviting space for those of us who are over 35 to find like-minded people, discuss our concerns, and reminisce over a cup of tea  :)   


(Adults), Join us in the Thirty-Five & Over Room every Wednesday! 

Would you like to be added to the Tag List?  Please reply to this thread Here

Our ever-growing support team are here to help you with any questions, so feel free to send us a message :)  Interested in joining the team?  Please PM 7cups.com/@MistyMagic

Please respect others' opinions, even if we strongly disagree. There is no right or wrong answer here. Please avoid conflict or arguments. 

Thank you!