HI,my name is beatparadise1124.

@beatPardise1124 Hey. It is true that Listeners may not give advice as in telling people what they should or shouldn't do or ultimate solutions. BUT we are still allowed to give suggestions and help people consider options, so it is quite much a matter of formulation. We can't say things like "You really should...", "You have to...", It would be right/wrong to..." But as long as the suggestion can't cause potential harm and is not for example medical or diagnostic, we can say things like "Have you considered...?", "Maybe it would be an idea to..." "One thing that helped me with this was..." "People who struggle with ... sometimes find it helpful to..." I see you on a Member account now and I am not sure how or where you would provide suggestions from there. But for Listeners, there are the Peer Support trainings where you learn to support someone with things you have been through yourself and how to refer to your own experience without being inappropriate or giving what 7cups calls advice.

@beatPardise1124 Hello, thank you for sharing that concern. I know what you mean about how it can be tempting to give members advice when they're struggling. I think one of the reasons why we don't give advice is because it can undermine a member's self-confidence in their abilities to find their own solutions. One thing that's helped me is knowing that different people have different needs and goals in life, so even if something worked for me, it might not work for them because they want to take their life in a different direction. Or there might be some information that they haven't yet shared that makes my solution impractical. I'm so glad to hear you're enjoying your time on 7 Cups!

@beatPardise1124

Hi! I completely understand the need to share advice, especially when you have encountered a similar situation yourself and feel you can contribute with experience. However, in these situations it is important to remember that we all experience certain situations in many different ways and context can differ for any of us.

Advice is easy to give, but it can sometimes be wrong or even harmful since we can't have a full understanding of the context and life of the person we are talking to. The best thing you can do is to help them figure out the path that will work best for them.

Even though you should refrain from giving advice, you can still help the member with questions, listening, and suggestions. Let them explore the choices they have and make the decisions without pressure.

Here are some helpful articles on the difference between advices and suggestions:

https://www.7cups.com/forum/ListenerLearningJourney_149/ListenerSupportGuidesandHowtos_1850/AdvicevsSuggestions_122404/

https://www.7cups.com/forum/ListenersOnlyForums_38/LISTENERTOPICGUIDESLIBRARY_129/ListenerSupportGuideAlternativestoGivingAdvice_5164/

I hope this helps!