Dealing with toxic relative - need prayers
I honestly don't know where to start. My CPTSD makes it difficult for me to assert myself and most of my trauma has come from family members. And now I have to live with one of such a relative and I feel so suffocated. The depressing feelings I used to have as a childhood, I am kind of in control of them for the past 3-4 years, but coming to stay with this relative, is such a challenge for me.
I am unable to concentrate, and they don't want me to go out at all, because they stay at home themselves, so having me like a prisoner seems great to them.
This person knows the trauma I have been through and at one point in my life acted as if they were on my side. So they know exactly what to do to trigger me.
This is so difficult for me, I can't find the courage to be my original happy self.
I am stuck, I don't know what to do.
I don't want to pity my existence, but I don't really know what to do.
My brain is just stuck somewhere.
But I want to get out of this rut.
🤕