Will never get answers

Trigger Warning: Gangrape, Strangulation

I want to feel little less heavy so want to pour my heart out ( no graphics but some of their sentences rephrased by me to look decent) it will be 2 years in few months.

I will never know why those 4 people chose me, who they were, their faces, their names, etc...and it hurts a lot because I remember other useless details but don't remember their faces...so now I don't have any faces to seek revenge on any name to identify them if I ever come across them again.

They made fun of my appearance, I cry everytime I think of this, me lying on a streetside ground and they seeing me and making jokes. Only my mom had seen me in my childhood other than myself. They made fun of almost every part of my body. After they were done and tried strangling me and I wasn't dying the person removed his hand I tried to speak and he told to others " listen this * wants to speak something maybe she isn't satis* yet shh listen to her ". All their words, laughs and actions make me hate my own self and ... They told me my legs are thick so now I feel heaviness in them every now and then...see theirs on top of mine

They didn't even know my name so throughout I heard slangs, what was my fault in just walking on a street...My soul feels crushed, how to hold on hope😔