Male sexual abuse
Why do listeners treat male sex abuse victims badly?
Yes I've had many listeners that admit they wouldn't speak to a female rape victim like they do to me, yet it seems perfectly acceptable.
I can't wait to hear many listeners who have said it to me say they don't, I have such a rant in my head I'm too panicky to even share
Great topic to raise awareness of, sometimes society doesn't appreacite how males can be sexually abused so the more we raise male sex abuse the better and the more support the better!! On behalf of 7cups sorry for you negative or unsupportive experiences. We all understand it's such a traumatic experience to suffer and emotions can run high, it seems like one sentence is vying for a fight with some "negative" people you've experienced; to which, I'd suggest moving on beyond from in terms of their person, but you did right raising a common theme you've experienced!
@fairmindedTangerine8216
hello tangerine, the feeling you are left with sounds very horrible and must have caused you to believe that there are different standards of how people are delt with. the verbal approach might be different depending on gender but abuse is abuse, the support is there for each gender. i am really so sorry that you have to go through these emotions.
@fairmindedTangerine8216
It's because society is under the delusion that guys can't be abused. In any way. That somehow we're impervious to that, I guess..? It's not true.
I've been verbally, physically, and sexually abused by both guys and girls. Abuse is abuse. No matter who you are or who it comes from--guy or girl. It's abuse and it hurts a whole *** lot and it should be taken just as seriously if you're a male victim as it is if you're a female.
@crimsonViolets
I had teachers say I can't be abused because I was a boy
@fairmindedTangerine8216
That's terrible and completely untrue. I'm so sorry that someone you should have been able to trust said something so horrible to you. It's unfair. I really hope you will find people in your life who will care for you enough to take you seriously and give you the support you need and deserve.
My heart goes out to you. I can't imagine your pain, not only for having experienced abuse but also to have people trivialized or maybe not even believe you could be hurt by it, particularly when it's by people you bravely reach out to for emotional support like the listeners here. Every human has a mind, emotions, and a body with which to be hurt deeply. It should be considered seriously, no matter what your sex or gender. Your abuse was real, the pain still hurts, and you deserve to be heard properly.
I'm sorry this happened to you. It isn't right. It isn't fair. I have found most listeners I get connected with don't even follow the basic guidelines of the listener's training, having done the listener training myself. If there's one thing I would encourage you to do, it's to find a respectful therapist in your community or online who knows men can be hurt, traumatized, and abused just as women can. Seek out therapy groups for abused men or in general. See if there's a mental health organization in your area and connect with them to see what resources are available to you. Search for open-source therapy groups online. Look up mental health organizations and hotlines that apply to your situation and make full use of them. Learn coping skills via the self-help section, under the Path drop down. Join the Trauma sub-community, if that makes sense to you. Don't allow all your care and coping to be limited to 7cups listeners, for whom finding a good listener for any issue seems to be a low probability. Your mental health is too important to leave up to just a gamble.
Keep trying and please don't give up on yourself. You're a worthwhile human being. I believe in you. You can overcome the pain you've had to endure.
*to have people trivialize your pain or maybe not even believe you could be hurt by it
This is all coming from a woman, as well. I am one of those who understands everyone suffers and everyone deserves to be free of that suffering.
@fairmindedTangerine8216
I am sorry that this is the case. Listeners should be supportive and understanding to everyone!
This may be happening because in general society, there is a stigma around it. People always talk more about female victims than male victims and so people down play it and view it as less important, which is terrible!
Male sex abuse is likely more common than people actually realise. You can very much be abused, whatever your gender.
I will try to bring up this topic within the listener community and maybe have a discussion about it to try to minimise these stereotypes and generalisations. I hope your future experiences here will be less troublesome for you. Take care!
