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♥Lemonade and Figgy♥ [Space]

TheLemonade November 16th, 2023

Hey @emotionalFig5074 

I figured here would be a good space for us to keep tags on each other and of course, this space is also open to anyone who would like to respond. 



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emotionalFig5074 November 16th, 2023

@TheLemonade hello! I'm an open book, I'm sorry to hear you've been around the trauma block yourself. 

3 replies
TheLemonade OP November 16th, 2023

@emotionalFig5074

Trigger Warning: Mentions of abuse (not specifics)

I mean with me it's a bit of a rollercoaster but I've been through the domestic abuse relationships, I've been through being homeless and going between houses trying to find a safe place to be. Now I am in a much better position in life where I'm not homeless and I've got a very supportive partner but the problem I have is that I hyper-fix onto certain memories and in the long run I end up hurting myself because I can physically feel those intense memories.  It's almost like having the power to go back in time to revisit the older memories and feel the emotions I felt back then and while sometimes I do miss that, even if it was abusive. 

For me, I do miss the routine, that's something that is definitely lacking with my current partner, and it's frustrating because of course, I think he's the best thing that's happened to me but during the abusive relationship, at least I knew what was happening next, so it's a bit difficult sometimes and it's definitely messed up with my mind. 

3 replies
emotionalFig5074 November 17th, 2023

@TheLemonade I'm sorry to hear your story but glad you're in a better place.  What do you mean by you miss the routine?

I've gotten really bad news about my health, so I'm a bit side tracked.  I've been really upset about it while I waited for results and now its worse now that I have them. I can't see a gyn until Monday.  I'm so tired of more roadblocks.  I asked the nurse how I am supposed to make it through the weekend.  She was like what do you mean, we could send you medication? I have medication. What do I do about my mind? How do I not have si thoughts? She was like "you could go to a walk in counselor." I've been in therapy for almost a year how is one session going to help? I would barely have time to explain why it's so upsetting.  

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