How do I move on?

I am 27 now. Well when I was 16 I had someone assault me while I was intoxicated. There were a few other girls there that knew what happened. Well when I went to the authorities that backed out and said they couldn't remember anything. It was our youth pastor who we went everywhere and did everything with. He was in his early 40s. He told us to come in so that we would be safe. Ha safe yup that 's what he said. Turns out we were the furthest thing from safe. Well I went to the authorities and because I did not say the word no... I pushed him away I tried to get away and because I did not actually say the word no they called it consentual rape. How is that even a thing?!?! Doesn't one word contradict the other? He went to jail for a couple weeks. Yup you heard that right a couple weeks. They didn't even inform me when he was released. I found out at school and had a breakdown in front of everyone. Well anywho we were from a small town so of course word got around to EVERYONE. Everyone knew who I was and what happened so I became the "nasty skank". Well enough about that. You get the story. He got in literally no trouble. Well here I am 11 years later and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't wonder why me. There were 3 other girls there. Not that I wish it on any of them, but why did he choose me?!?!?! How do I move on? How do I feel better? I still have extreme anxiety because of it. Like seriously there are days when people that I am closest to can't even touch me. Does it ever get better? Does it ever go away?