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How do you learn to trust and open up to a therapist (Potential TW?)

intellectualSquare829 March 12th, 2021
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I have been in therapy since I was seven, but have trouble trusting any of my therapists because I feel ashamed and guilty most of the time. I also grew up afraid of being taken out of my home and put into foster care (father had untreated serious mental illness and things were not great). I also had some really not so nice therapists (one even quit on me when I was little).

Honestly, I don't know how to trust anyone in a position of authority because I am scared of being abused or worse off than I started.

Does/did anyone else feel this way? How did you get past it?

1
WelcomeToChat March 12th, 2021
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@intellectualSquare829

Hi !

Very relevant question !

It is difficult to trust someone to tell our deepest feelings and experiences, things we might not tell anybody else.

We feel vulnerable doing so.

In my personal experience, trusting your therapist is a necessary condition for therapy to be effective. I have also gone to many therapists since childhood. I left many because I was not convinced that they were "the right one".

At first, you need to feel some minimum of comfort in her/his presence. It should feel like you are talking to a good person, with good intentions toward yourself.

At some point, you have to take "a leap of faith", to trust wholeheartedly in your therapist, because you decided to do therapy with that professional, and trust is, as I said, a necessary condition of any successful treatment.

Do it in the know that, if after some time you are not convinced about how your therapy is going, you can always change your therapist.

Also, that as mental health professionals, they are subject to a strict code of ethics and confidentiality. They are vulnerable too ! You can complain to the relevant authorities (it depends on the place/state/country) and even go to court if they misbehave.

Also in my personal experience, most therapists are well-trained professionals and caring, compassionate people, that will do all they can to help you.

I hope this helps to trust your therapist more.

Please let me know of any questions you might have, by replying to me down here.

I wish you all the best !

Marcelo.