Confused & Molested (*Trigger Warning*)

I know we are not supposed to give advice here, and I'm not a Listener, but I did read your post, and I heard you. Similar things happened to me and healing did come eventually. I will believe the same for you. I did find that making friends on a nonsexual level helped me to feel more secure in general.

Hi Linsay31,

First off, I would like to let you know that it was very brave of you to share with us such an event and that I am sorry you had to go through such an experience. It is something that can affect one's life and it is important to let people know that you are experiencing this kind of abuse. These things can have a long lasting effect on someone's life and it might take time or even counselling to get over the feeling you are presently experiencing. Also, from what I read the fact that your family doesn't aknowledge what has happened to you might inadvertadly reinforce the taboo of your exprience and make you feel like this needs to be hidden or that you should keep it to yourself. I just want to let you know that the unfortunate encounter that happened with this man could have happened to anyone and that it isn't your fault in any way. I am not trying to deminish what happened to you, it is something that can be very damaging for a young girl at that age, but simply letting you know that this happens and there are ressources out there who can help you deal with the repercutions of the molestation. I was wondering if you had ever told your familly how avoiding the subject affected you and how the event is still affecting you today in your relationship. I can also imagine that it can be hard to tell that special someone or a trusted person about what you have experienced but it can sometimes help if you are not alone in the healing process. I also would suggest you to get in contact with a psychologist or a counsellor, not because you are broken or weak but because sometimes we need help to heal from such experiences. If you want to find one but aren't sure where to look, you can start by looking at the following website: http://therapists.psychologytoday.com

I also believe that the website RAINN (https://rainn.org/)could help you out with what has happened to you in the pass. It can provide help for survivor of sexual abuse and you can even contact their hotline. You can also learn more about the aftermate of your experience and what ressources you can receive.

Finally, I just wanted to let you know that these are options available to you for your situation and that it is your choice to seek them out. I hope this will help you in your healing process and can also help you with creating a relationship with that someone special.

Do not dispair you can be helped.

Fitrandi

@Fitrandi

Hi, thank you for the support. This has been a long struggle for me mostly because it happened twice by two different men. One was a friend of the family and it happened not twenty feet from where my mother was sleeping. The second time was by my older brother; which I'm forced into close proximity with as we both live with our mother. No one in my family believes me about the second time either. I also tend to agree with you about my family acting like these horrible events didn't happen to me being part of the cause of my anxiety. How can I let go of these past events?

I'm so sorry for what happened to you, it is not in any way ok. Just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you and hope you find some peace soon, it sounds like this has been a long battle for you.

@JayBumble

Hi, thank you. It has been a long battle for me. I still have trouble socializing with people. I also still don't trust people either. In my original post I failed to mention that I was molested twice, once by a family friend and once by my older brother. My family refuses to accept either event as facts. They think I remembered it wrong or just made it up. I want to get over it but pretending that it never happened just doesn't work for me.