fictional character in my head protects me from trauma
since i was a young kid i've had a fictional protector, it seems to stem from a mix of autism (special interests), maladaptive daydreaming, and trauma. when i was younger they served as my guardians as my parents gave me very little attention and hit me and emotionally abused me. when i was groped they started being superpowered characters who never lose and constantly protect me. they are in my head all the time, processing everything for me before allowing me to be in the moment, so i usually have a buffer period of between .5 seconds and 15 seconds where they're experiencing, filtering, and explaining to me. they're closer to me than anyone, and no real life relationship can compare to my relationship with my protectors
@Basilstorm I've heard of this type of coping mechanism. Do you think it's a healthy one? It sounds like these fictional protectors have had very real effects on your life. Thanks for sharing, Basil <3
@Basilstorm I wish I coped like that. I coped like my mom with her dad who just so happens to be the one who caused me trauma. I coped by stress eating and trying to expel him from my life and the lives of those I care about.
I have the same kind of coping mechanism; they've been with me for years now. It's helped me stay sane in this household of mine.
@Basilstorm
That is amazing. your story kind of reminds me of one of the voices I had from time to time. I was going through a lot at the time, but this voice kept talking to me through. Saying to me "we'll get out of this, we'll find an escape. Keep looking." I was terrified of the place I was in and I really needed a safe spot. This one kind of gave me hope to still go forward despite all the fears. Sometimes characters offer us the best support!
Your story remind me on something very similar have happened to me in darkest days when I was a child. My personality has been split for many years and that was caused from many traumas and strong sense of fear. My personality divided in two Me extremely Fragile and scared and another Me extremely Strong, brave, smart and this Strong me I could say absolutely helped me to survive and deal with any all kind of impossible and very dangerous reality. It was able to make fast and useful decisions. I felt much safer. Really protected. This personality still exist somewhere inside of me. It comes out in situations of extreme danger and it protects not only me, even other people around me in case of any kind of serious accidents. It was something very positive in my life.
@Basilstorm
I had something similar to this. It was a black wolf that had wings and could attack my abuser and fly me away from my life. Sometimes, I also imagined I was the wolf
I have a similar coping mechanism for my trauma that I adapted since I was little to help keep me sane and functioning. I often don't really tell people about it because I worry I will be judged for it. I didn't have a support system so my imaginery friends became my support system. I made imaginery family as well. I still sometimes talk to myself as if I'm talking to these people I created in my head for comfort and support when I need it. It helps me feel less alone. Sometimes I'll even hug myself.
