What to do now?

@ang110206 I am sorry you are feeling you are having trouble with relationships. That must be difficult to cope with.

I think my expectation has been unrealistic in the past thinking someone could make me happy when I am not happy and I have had to work on that.

Have you considered getting professional help?

It sounds like you are going through a difficult time and feeling alone and disconnected from those around you. It's important to remember that your feelings are valid and that it's okay to ask for help. Consider reaching out to a mental health professional or a support group to talk about your experiences and develop coping strategies. It's also important to practice self-compassion and forgiveness towards yourself, as everyone makes mistakes and has difficult times. Take things one day at a time and focus on small steps towards feeling better, such as engaging in activities that bring you joy or finding ways to support others in your community. Remember that things can and will get better, even if it doesn't feel like it right now.