Ad-dict-ion

Hey everyone,

I've into substance abuse for almost 7 years now. I did not do it while attending lectures, studying or writing exams, initially, but right in the end of my bachelor's degree, it got way worse and I ended up being dysfunctional.

Since then, it's been an on and off ride. I'm not a daily user, but, when I get into it, it goes to new extremes.

I'd say I've extremism problems, like I cannot stop myself unless I drop dead silent, or incur a very painful injury in the process.

The word Ad-dict feels like, etymologically, to-say, to me. Keep saying the same stuff, keep doing the same stories over and over again, choosing that body chemistry over and over again!

Somehow, I've been away from marijuana since the start of this year and I hope to continue that. But, I took up alcohol as a new project, it seems to me.

I'm not sure how I'm going to stay afloat with my tendencies to enhance my experience through substances. I guess, I am lonely and feel wayyyyy casted-out in my mind. The roots might have been there all along, but, there's always a chance for growth for every individual, I'd say. I've broken habit loops previously, by using my pre frontal cortex lol, but I'm not sure right now, as I cannot even do normal daily functions well enough.

Hope everyone's having happy lunches and healthy dinners. 🔆