Prescribed Drug addiction

I was aware of having drug addition problems in my family and also I had already alcohol addiction when I was copying. I was telling in my late medical provided that I didn’t want to take benzodiazepines but she thought that I wasn’t an alcoholic and I am overreacting, 4 years later I am still struggling with benzodiazepines addiction and when I should take under specific circumstances I am experiencing intrusive thoughts expecting the time that I could get the next dosage, and this is the point that I should raise it to my doctor to stop the medication.

So in times of severe distress I should use benzodiazepines and then I am experiencing severe withdrawal symptoms such as fever, tremors, nightmares, heightened irritability and anxiety. And all of these for no reason , since I warned my previous psychiatrist that I don’t want to take these medication except for urgent situations, she didn’t hear me and now I have severe addiction and it is hard. Harder than alcohol since I had to take this medication when needed.