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Should I keep my long term friends, like family before sober.. now?

Dogsaregreat44 September 13th, 2022

Sorry it’s long but new to this Sober and happy about it thing.. should I keep my friends I don’t really like, when I am not drunk last two months? Some I have known for 12+;years and love them bit put think they may be toxic and new different values, I guess? 🤷🏼‍♂️🇦🇺🦘✌️🐾🌄 👍🐶

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LostTurtle22 September 13th, 2022

@Dogsaregreat44

that's a hard one. you should keep ones who are supportive of you and your new values and lifestyle. it;s hard to let go of people, especially long term friends, but toxic people have to go... you can just re-frame the friendship and put it on a more shallow level, i guess...

1 reply
Dogsaregreat44 OP September 13th, 2022

@LostTurtle22 thanks.. sadly I agree.. I offered them. 40 acres to start a life out of the city for free.. then they. Stress about. Everything and. Little things escalated with each other and others, only one real issue with myself and. I removed myself instead of. Reacting like learnt on here.. 72 days sober today.. felt like adrink “just .” One” I thought..

i didn’t but was starting to find excuses to have just one.. lol.. instead I wrote on here and don’t. Want to again..

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LostTurtle22 September 14th, 2022

man, that's hard. do you keep track of triggers, like your trigger count everyday?. and do you have a special support system for a high trigger count day?

1 reply
Dogsaregreat44 OP September 16th, 2022

@LostTurtle22 nope not really mate.. I live very remote and only see people once maybe twice every few weeks.. family and old friends left behind to not have to deal with the new me post accident.. they have lives and things to do didn’t need to look after me also.. moved to a place that is an hour drive to a “town” few thousand people only live there..

triggers really only people being mean to others or rude.. oh and animal or any type of abuse obviously not cool.. being a country boy growing up.. we would get involved to help.. however these days no real triggers for me wanting to drink.. it was just the way to be and everyone does out here.. drinking all good.. the friends offered place here, started yelling and carrying on..

i asked for the base of the problems, which were nothing to do with myself.. the roads out here are damaging their car, they don’t like driving up mountains, the accomodation at the local (only) little pub was crap, everything was hard and an issue..

I had asked for a lift to the hospital for tests which was on the way when they driving home.. they also knew it has been 3-4 years and think may have serious prostate issues.. use to thiNk the going to the toilet all the time just from the drinking and whatnot.. yet now as been off the sauce for a bit, and the inability to sleep, pain in various parts at night wakes me up etc.. no sleep a bit of trigger, otherwise I am chillaxed as.. talkative yep when actually get out or typing dog behaviour things etc..

now not drinking and looking at the world in a new way.. seeing some things 5at need to change..

thoses friends told the offer for free land the rest of their lives now withdrawn.. they got upset that they had to go 30mins up a mountain to drop me at serious tests needed.. yelling at me as it will hurt their car.. it is tar, sealed road.. yelled that I didn’t mention it was up a big hill.. nope I didn’t say the type of road the night before.. I asked for a lift to hospital for tests on their way, get to my property at 6am to watch sunrise and then also the drop off of me not putting their plans out at all..

they turned up at 7:22 and the time became their issues I think.. not really the roads, hills or pub cheap room.. anyway.. hope that clarifying a bit better mate :-) 🇦🇺🦘🐾🌅 🌄

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