I'm stuck
TW please do not read this if you're triggered by active use.
After years of substance abuse drinking has now become a daily occurrence for me. Some days it's only a couple and other days I binge drink. But I don't really go a day without. Especially before social interactions I feel like I have to drink and sneak a couple of shots before I go. I have also relapsed into substances a couple of times this year and also prescription drugs which I combine with alcohol. My therapist told me that I need to leave therapy if I can't get sober on my own since it's a contra indication for my current outpatient therapy. I don't know what to do. On top of this all of my "friends" in real life are also addicts so it's extremely lonely. I can't even be alone by myself anymore without a couple of drinks since it's the only thing that numbs my mental issues. I want to do better but I don't think I can and it feels like all hope is lost. Just want to know that I'm not alone. I feel like I'm destroying myself.
@Spockette
Dealing with substance abuse can be really hard and challenging at times. Here is a great self-help guide that will provide you with tools to start with and to understand how you can better manage it: https://www.7cups.com/supportGuides/selfHelpGuides.php
Talking to someone about what you are expereincing can really help! There are many wonderful and compassionate listeners that are ready to support and listen to you. You can browse the listener page here: https://www.7cups.com/BrowseListeners/
Best wishes <3
Reading this I felt like I wrote this. I'm struggling as well and I feel alone. I don't want to be like this but I don't know how to stop. I need help.
@mommy2594
Hello there!
If you need to talk someone about what you are expereincing , it can really help! There are many wonderful and compassionate listeners that are ready to support and listen to you. You can browse the listener page here: https://www.7cups.com/BrowseListeners/
@Spockette if I had to describe myself a few years ago, this would have been my word too. But I was never brave enough to say it out . I guess,I knew what the reality was but I was too coward to say it out or even accept it my self. I don't know what mind issues makes it difficult to stay alone without drinking. But for me it was shame. I was ashamed that I let myself be an addict. Felt pathetic because I let others down. I prefered to stay numb than ashamed. But things changed when my therapist made me realise that people that take drugs or alcohol aren’t evil or pathetic, they’ve just found a solution to stress that takes over before they realise it’s got them by the balls. That realisation dawned painfully slow. It was still a struggle to fight addiction. But I felt more comfortable with my self. I started to forgive myself for being an addict. I am not sure if telling you my story helps. But I felt it would.
@JustHumanThatsNotPerfect
Thank you so much for sharing your story! I'm sure it helped and if often helps to hear other people who had gone through a similar or the same situation since it does help to keep the hope alive, that if you got through this, so can I! <3
Update: thanks for all your replies. They gave me some comfort. Drinking has been going a bit better, with a binge here and there. I try to avoid it whenever I can, but it's hard. I have talked to my therapist about better ways of coping and we're working on it.
@Spockette Glad to hear that, you're working on new ways of coping. Glad to hear that, you're working with a therapist. Take things slowly, you will get there. It just takes time. Baby steps, my friend. Take it one day at a time.