1 Week Clean after being Clean for 1 Year
TW: Mention of Relapse
I had a relapse last week and blacked out. Fortunately it hasn't happened again but the pull is still there. I was clean for 3 years after the first bit, relapsed, was clean again for 2, relapsed again, then I was clean for one, but then last week happened. I wish I was free from it because it doesn't just hurt me, it hurt's my fiance. I can't control what I do during black outs and we think I have DID (therapist and friends) and so they don't think it was me who did it, but it still happened and I still feel guilty about it.
I want to be able to make it to another year and then another year, and then just continue it, but I guess I have to go day by day? I don't really know what kind of goal to set for myself. I don't know what a good time frame is.
@crystallizedrequiem
Hello,
I like how you said you just have to take it day by day.<3
I know it may be challenging, but you go this<3
We're here for you. 💛✨
@crystallizedrequiem I'm sorry you relapsed, the guilt we feel after it's indescribable, specially when we have someone by our side, like a fiancee. We tend to feel like we need to be on the right path, if not for us, for them, so when we relapse, everything's the worst.
I really do hope you are able to continue not using it, I'm rooting for the best! You are incredibly strong, so thank you so much for still not giving up and for sharing your story 💜
