tw: negative body image and comparing myself

@Ya067

Beauty is not comparable because the whole person matters .....  it is true but we hear it but not understand until we see it ourselves.  It is not about weight or makeup.... 

       I tried when young to do makeup and follow the style of someone who i thought was so pretty ...but it looked different on me .... not classy and cool.... but like dressing up  ........i was uncomfortable and somehow it never came together ...........only when I decided to wear what i liked and i felt confident in was  at ease and people noticed. Many compliments and just noticed i was in my own 

Makeup did not work well on me ...many brands  changed color with my chemistry.... I  looked orange... when i quit wearing face makeup and limited eye makeup did i look natural and healthy ....... now years down the road my skin looks 15 years younger then the friends and family that wore a mask of makeup everyday. 

when a person i admire told me how beautiful they see me and helped me i see what they see.... could care less what someone else sees or thinks ....    FIND you the rest will follow. 

@Ya067

I truly appreciate you opening up about what you’re experiencing; it takes a lot of courage to share such personal feelings. It sounds like you’re going through a very difficult time, grappling with negative thoughts about yourself and struggling with comparison to others. I want you to know that these feelings, while painful, are something many people face, and it’s okay to feel this way.

The way you’re describing your reflection and comparing yourself to others shows how deeply you’re hurting. It’s important to understand that our internal struggles often don’t match up with reality. The self-judgment you’re feeling is not a true measure of who you are. Your worth and value are not dictated by your appearance or by how you compare to others. 

You’re working hard to make changes, whether through exercise or makeup, and that effort shows your commitment to improving how you feel. However, real self-worth and self-love go beyond external changes. It’s about recognizing and accepting the unique person you are. You have inherent value that isn’t tied to your physical appearance. 

Take a moment to reflect on the qualities you admire in yourself, beyond the surface. Maybe you’re kind, thoughtful, or hardworking—these traits are integral to who you are. Celebrate these aspects and remind yourself that they contribute to your worth just as much as, if not more than, your outward appearance.

Consider incorporating small, positive practices into your daily routine that focus on self-care and self-acceptance. This might be affirmations, journaling about things you’re grateful for, or engaging in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. It can also be helpful to surround yourself with people who appreciate and uplift you, and to engage in positive self-talk.

Please be gentle with yourself. Everyone has their own struggles, and it’s important to treat yourself with the same compassion and understanding that you would offer to a friend in a similar situation. You deserve to feel good about yourself and to recognize your own worth.

Remember, you are valuable and deserving of love and respect just as you are. It may take time to fully see and embrace this, but with patience and self-compassion, it’s possible to build a more positive and affirming self-image. You’re not alone in this, and it’s okay to take small steps towards feeling better about yourself.