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Trying to Find Myself

CapnPika October 21st, 2023

Hello. First off I will preface that, I don't really know what I believe anymore. I come from a Christian background, but over the years I suffered very much because of beliefs that were imposed on me from a young age.

I have studied many religions, many faiths. I could never find a home. Recently with many events in the world I have been studying Islam. Trying to understand it, take it in. All I want is a home. Acceptance. I am hurting but don't know where to turn.

My question is.. has anyone here experienced something similar?
I am drawn to Islam, I feel connected with what I am learning. I am fearful that I may never find a true home when it comes to trying to discover myself..

So much has been imposed on me I am trying to shed my "childhood" and the trauma. I want to heal.

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SolarGenerator October 21st, 2023

I'm open to talking about it @CapnPika

1 reply
CapnPika OP October 21st, 2023

@SolarGenerator

Thank you very much. I would love to talk to someone about this. 
I feel drawn to Islam. I feel a connection in what I am learning, understanding, I just am cut off from most people who could help me understand this considering where I am from, there is very little guidance where I live for anything other than what I was forced into as a child.

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redemptionarc November 14th, 2023

I relate to this so strongly. In fact, I would've thought I wrote this myself and forgot about it. I took a leap and embraced Islam and honestly it has helped me heal. Even though I'm not in many Muslim spaces just growing in faith and discovering what I believe in as am adult with choices now I feel liberated. It's still hard though, don't get me wrong. There's a lot of nuance to it that I can't cough out in a paragraph

communicativePond1728 November 15th, 2023

@CapnPika

Yes, I'm going through a similar thing...what is it about Islam that you enjoy? What other cultures or religions have you explored that you also liked? Do you think creating your own spirituality or religion in the sense that you piece aspects of different ones together like a quilt might be helpful, or would you rather follow one as it is? Have you ever had a spiritual experience, or doubted the existence of a higher power? What do you think of indigenous cultures and doukhobor culture?

exuberantTalker9747 November 20th, 2023

I can relate to this soo much. I am Hindu but I remember, from my childhood my family was followers of a spiritual organisation in my country and in this organisation I learnt so much about spirituality from every religion possibly and last year I read try to get deep into spirituality and I read a book from of great old Yogi from India and he has his own organisation and I feel some kind of connected to the what was written in book and now at this point of time sometimes I feels doubted and lost to what to follow.

I believe more in God, I respect every religion and I learn from every religion as all religions talks about God. In organisation we talk about God, after reading the book I also felt connected to the organisation which I am following from my childhood. But sometimes I have some doubts about what I am doing is right or not.

I don't have much spiritual friends or people to talk about it, only my sister are whom with I talk about it. Every Sunday I go there to get learnings and just came back home, now I am feeling like i am not getting into it. As I go to there very less now.

I am writing this cause I am Feeling so related to you. May you find your answer. God bless you