starting over and reconnecting with God
Hello everyone,
Earlier this year I had a lot of things going on which affected my relationship with God. I don't know how to come back to him and rebuild our relationship. Dec 2023, I got heartbroken, and I became Numb to love but I still tried to hold on to God's love. Then I got news from my parents that they needed me to defer my grad school admission because they could not afford it and at the same time my grandma developed lung cancer. After that, I lost my job and my grandma finally passed on.
I started school and a new job in April so I've been super busy. I have not had time to go to church consistently and even when I have time I'm unmotivated or just generally stressed from school/ life. I'm also in the choir and have not been going for rehearsal or meetings. I feel so separated from the church and God and I'm not sure how to get back into in. I feel like everything happening this year just made me distance myself from God (maybe I was upset or just didn't know how to deal with grieve/ stress).
I know I love God but sometimes I feel that is not enough (or is it?). I still feel blessed but guilty that the relationship isn't what it was. I would hate to come off transactional because I genuinely believe in and love God. Even if it seemed I gave up on love, I met the most wonderful man in August, and it feels like he was Godsent.
Thank you for listening!
@gracefulBerry2499 Hi Graceful. It seems you have through quite the stuff in a short period of time; one thing after another. Sometimes in life it's easy to feel a disconnect when we are lacking the one thing we really need. It's beautiful that you believe in and love God truly. He's an amazing God to say the least. With having to defer grad school due to finances, loss of employment, and your Grandma losing her battle with lung cancer... well that's a lot to deal with. Life happens to all of us, but it's good to keep in mind that we wouldn't be here without Him. When we going through challenges and difficulties in life, I believe God wants us to be able to find comfort, peace, and healing by drawing closer to Him. The great thing is you can talk to God anytime you want! Day or night; it doesn't matter. Whenever you want to talk to Him and draw close to him, to feel his presence, etc then He's there for you. You can also read your Bible and find peace in the scriptures before you. Loving God is a beautiful thing and you can get back feeling connected and close; you just have to keep making the efforts to do so. <3 I'm so happy you feel blessed. I have no doubt you are, Graceful! Wishing you all the best with everything! Xoxo.
