Struggling With Acceptance
Hey guys. So I have a bf of 6 months (we’re both in high school going to our sophomore year) and he is an amazing boyfriend. In fact tmrw is his birthday lol. Anyways, I am having trouble finding a way to tell my parents. I am pakistani and my bf is chinese. My parents are racist especially my mom when it comes to east asian people. After I moved schools in elementary school, I’ve always ended up becoming friends with east asians and they’re great people. My 2 best friends are japanese and taiwanese. I also have other friends of other races as well. But my mom always complains about me being friends with asian people and she calls everyone chinese.
So in December, I started dating my current bf and during break he came over and met my parents. (I’ve also told my parents that he’s smart and a nice kid which all are true). They also know I talk to him everyday and that we’re friends. I know I should tell them because of this but my parents have made it very clear that they don’t want me to have an asian boyfriend. Idk what to do cuz it’s been 6 months already and I really want to tell them, but my parents aren’t great people either. I asked my best friend and she told me to never tell my parents because of how awful they can be.
The main reason I want to tell them is so I can hang out with him whenever. My parents haven’t let me out the house on my own until this school year (i just started high school last year). So what should i do? Should i tell them?
Note: I am pakistani which means I am muslim and so are my parents. However, we aren’t a very religious family and my parents are against me talking to guys or too against dating either, so when things come to religion, I think that’s a matter I will speak to my parents about.
Hey there,
It sounds like you're in a tough situation with your parents regarding your relationship with your boyfriend. It must be really challenging to navigate cultural differences and their expectations.
It's understandable that you want to tell your parents about your boyfriend so you can spend more time with him and be open about your relationship. At the same time, you're worried about their reaction, especially given their attitudes towards Asian people.
You mentioned that your best friend advised against telling them due to how they might react. Would telling them put you in a difficult of unsafe situation?
@AmyPondd i’m not really sure. i have a feeling my parents will be disappointed in me for dating someone who is chinese and disappointment will hurt along with all the other things my mom has said to me in the past.
@sunnyTalker6138
It sounds like you're feeling really concerned about how your parents will react to your relationship. It's understandable that their potential disappointment is weighing heavily on you, especially considering the hurtful things your mom has said before.
What do you think is the worst, respectively the best, that can happen if you tell them?