Should people make excuses for cheating?? Like blame it on their alcohol abuse and or drug abuse or any addiction?? Should they blame their "anger"??
My husband recently cheated on me with 4 escorts in our own home while I was gone. He claims he did it because he was "past drunk and his alcohol abuse use made him do it out of anger because I made him mad after we had a dispute". To this day, he uses the alcohol consumption abuse to his best extent and I call it making up excuses for his actions because I believe humans do what we do because we want to not because of anything else. We're human after all but I don't believe in putting an excuse for our actions.
@Confounded1 No they are not excuses for harmful actions. However alcohol abuse and many substance abuse make people lose their sense of personal and moral and ethical values and do not thing of the irreversible consequences of them hurting others...I am terribly sorry that you are a victim of such behaviour and keep in mind that he may already be out of control with his situation and start thinking about weighing options and making decisions for your medium and long time life...I am again truly sorry for what you are going through and feel for you...
@bledBones @Confounded1 I agree with both of you. They are not excuses. We humans do what we do because we want to, not because of anything else. Someone who abuses alcohol wants to abuse alcohol. Someone who gets mad because of a dispute wants to get mad. Someone who cheats on their wife wants to cheat.
That's not to say there are no hidden reasons that might make a person who previously wanted to be sober, reasonable and faithful change into wanting to be a drunk, angry cheat. Helping people to understand and deal with their hidden reasons is the kind of thing therapists do, and some of them are very good at it. But not every drunk, angry cheat chooses to go along with therapy.
Charlie
