Probably bipolar boyfriend
Hi, I am 25F in relationship with 25M for the past 8 and half years. He would have minor mood swings but other then that he was the best person. Around 2 years back, he went into an episode which I still don't know much about as he completely cut me off. He spoke to me later only after I got infected with covid and was scared that he'll lose me. Similar episode has turned up now since the last 4 months where he cut me off when I needed him, demands increased sexual activities but insults me while doing so, or just stops, much into alcohol and partying, can't manage finances, has hinted at being with other girls, keeps lying about everything, and completely ignorant about this behaviour at times. He constantly compares with me. Keeps insulting and degrading me. At times got aggressive. I tried my best to talk to him but my last straw was when I met a few days back, he forcibly tried to kiss me and said that I won't have any proof if I complain to anyone about it. I walked off and didn't reach back to him. He called me after few days, completely ignoring what happened and trying to be normal. It had taken a mental toll on me as I suffer from anxiety. I am better now. I just want to know that should I leave him? Or should I be there for him? I don't understand.
@Ibelieveinstars Hey, I understand how stressed you must feel from this situation. Please don't feel the need to take my advice to heart, but I do think that staying away for the time being is perfectly acceptable. If you've already tried talking to him and figuring things out together and he's just shut it down or has made no effort into changing, then there is no need to be around that toxicity.
Sending love and support, sparkly kitten
Thank you so much for the kind words.
Yes, I stayed away... still staying away, doing much much better actually. I'm feeling kind of emotionally independent. And he's trying to get back now, regretting his behaviour and everything. But I don't think I'll ever be able to trust him again. So I don't know what is the next step for me, I guess I still need time to figure it out. If he changes for better and I can see it then good. Or else it's an easy choice actually.
Much love to you.
Hi i am facing similar situation may we talk...my name is @CharlotteYangsilin. Hugs and hopes everything would be all right.
@Ibelieveinstars I realise you must be in a really tough time and situation. But trust me you are the best adviser to yourself. Maybe you could try weighing the pros and cons. Also remember to always protect your self respect. But again you are the best adviser to yourself. Hope you will be fine soon.
@Ibelieveinstars
I'm sorry you experienced this, this seems really confusing and stressful for you and you have every right to choose to do what makes you feel at peace. The way he treats you is unfair and you deserve to have your consent taken seriously. It's nice of you to want to help him and be there for him but you should not do it at your own expense. Do what makes you feel best. You got this. Sending love and support from afar <33
Run, don’t walk !! U deserve better girl !!
@Ibelieveinstars
I Feel Your Situation Is Really Difficult Because Your Relationship Is Old Enough For Complete Attachment With The Person And I Understand That Makes It Even More Difficult For You To Go Through This Situation But I Just Want To Ask That As You Mentioned He Had Done Similar Thing 4 Years Ago Too But Came Back When You Were Sick So Did You Ask Him What Was The Reason For That (Going Away And Ignoring You) ?
But Apart From It In Your Current Situation It Might Be Possible He Is Going Through Some Kind Of Stress (Maybe Financial As You Mention He Couldn't Handle) So Discussing That With Him When He Is In A Good Mood Might Help Both Of You.
As Your Relationship Is Old It Will Be Quite Difficult To Absolutely Cut Him Off Instantly So It Will Be Better For You After The Recent Incident To Maintain Distance With Him And See If He Improves And If Not Than You Are The Best Person To Take The Decision About It As It Will Affect Your Whole Life. And Maintaining Some Distance Will Also Make Your Feel Better And You Will Spend Time With The Most Precious Thing For You And That's Inner You.
