I'm kind of hurt
So, tell me if I'm being selfish:
My boyfriend and I are in high school. He works a fast food job that takes up most of his free time. I play the cello, and it's my passion. We've been dating for about a year and a half.
Recently, I got inducted into the Music Honors Society. I kid you not, I would literally rush home every single day for the past 3 months to look for a letter in the mailbox. I finally made it, and he knew how much it meant to me. However, a half an hour before the ceremony he says he is stressed. I ask if he's still coming, and I dont get another reply but he doesn't show up.
In his defense, he is in a school-work program where if he doesn't work 15 hours a week, he wont graduate, and his manager is refusing to schedule him at least 15 hours.
Another time, I made it into a state orchestra that id auditioned for 3 years, but just now made it this year. It was a 3 hour drive away, and my parents were going to drive him. However, the night before he says he is tired because he worked and needed a day to relax.
Am I being selfish? I am starting to feel hurt. I also feel like I'm being apathetic to him, though. What do you guys think?
Wow, first of all you sound like a very accomplished musician so great job! You should take pride in that! Relationships are a 2 way street. You support each other's successes and cushion each other's falls. Does it feel like that's what's happening here?
@hopefulMango92
To start with, congratulations on all your merits! You're doing great!
According to me, he might genuinely not been able to make it to your important days, all you need to make him understand is how good you'd feel if he was there for them. Sometimes we stop taking the extra effort to make someone happy, especially after the relationship has been going for quite a while. You just have to make him realise that he needs to start taking that extra effort, you arent asking for it everyday, just these special occassions which mean so much to you.
And on your part, I dont think you're wrong in anyway. Your expectations are natural. You want to share your happiness with him, make him proud. Infact even after all this, you're being the understanding one. So its going great. Dont worry :)
I hope everything falls in place, I know it eventually will. Good luck and take care <3