I ended a toxic relationship but it still hurts
I came here to vent. Heartbreak hurts...even if it was me who ended the relationship. On the one hand I feel free. On the other hand, I’m incredibly lost and sad.
I have to let go of all those dreams that never came true, all the plans we had, the family that couldn’t be, the person I loved and wanted, the person I thought he was, the person I was when we were together.
I know it will take time to heal and I made the best decision but I didn’t end it because of lack of love, just because it was a toxic situation that had been going on for way too long and was affecting me badly. But right now I’m hurting and lost.
@holdingtohope I am so sorry you are hurting and feeling lost. It’s ok and totally normal to have all kinds of conflicting feelings. Ending a relationship, toxic or not, is hard. Keep trusting yourself and doing what’s best for you. You deserve it. 😊
Hi, I'm going through what sounds like exactly the same thing and it's horrible. Especially if you've been together for a long time.
I don't know if this will help but I downloaded an app called Break Up Boss. It's not free but I really like it. It's funny but also gives really good advice about how to work through the break up and find the single you again. It also has a function where you can send an imaginary message to your ex saying whatever you want just to vent.
Other than the app, the other things that have helped me are talking to friends, anything distracting (work, TV, cleaning), really noticing how kind everyone around me has been and writing a really self-indulgent diary.
I've also been writing down who I will be this time next year. How happy I will be about who I am because I am someone who can be treated like **** but reply to that with behaviour I'm proud of. Also, the type of person I would want to be with when I am ready for that (I have a check list and my ex only scored 3/13 - I may have been a bit biased when I wrote that....)
I hope one of these things helps you. And I hope you have someone to give you a hug. It can only get better!
xxx