How do you know it’s love?
How do you know when you love someone or how do you know when someone loves you? I’d love to hear your thoughts.
I believe that you know you're in love when you think about how anything you do can hurt your partners feelings and try not to do those things, I think you love someone when you consider their emotions before you do something.
@Tionna123 I love your take on this! Thank you for your input to the thread! ☺️ Do you think letting go is a form of love? I.e. In a situation where one thinks a break-up would make their partner happier in the long run?
yes you have to love your partner enough to be willing to do what’s best for them even if it hurts right now
@ImALittleStuckInPast23 Personally, I think no one has the right to decide about the happiness of his or her partner. It's always a tricky decision, easy to be made by wrong reasoning or bad influences. As the proverb says: ***'s floor is paved with people's good intentions.
@ImALittleStuckInPast23
Very interesting!
@alsea Snooping on my profile? 👀🙏🏻 ahahah thank you for the chat yesterday - loved having you there 🥰🙏🏻💕
@ImALittleStuckInPast23
Hahaha don't worry! I am subscribed to the relationship stress forum and saw you, and even if I cannot answer your question, I had to interact with you!! I might be about to break up with my bf, I don't know if it will happen. I hope we get to chat again soon, it might be interesting! Don't want to trauma dump or trigger tho 😬😬
@alsea Honestly it is a tough question. Love is different for all. What you want out of love is different for everyone but I think coming to terms with that is the first step to building a good relationship too. Thank you for interacting!! :) Nice to have you here!! And there’s no worries on the dumping - I welcome your struggles. Just hearing that someone has it tough sometimes makes us feel less alone with all of our struggles too. I know you said in the group chat about your bf.. I can honestly relate - few months before me and my ex broke up I sought out therapy because I was so afraid I am toxic and was ruining our relationship.. it’s scary.. there are things I regret doing and saying so I am hoping I can heal and become better so I have a healthier relationship in the future <3 I just keep telling myself that if he had been the one I wouldn’t have felt so alone and in constant fear of him hurting me.. so <3 there is always someone for us, but at the same time there is always something we can improve or work on <3
@ImALittleStuckInPast23
I agree and relate so much with your words, even tho I have this thoughts all over the place. He honestly took me out of the darkest place. He always says he didn't do anything, it was me who did the work. I am still trying to figure it out. I also seek therapy. I've been with my therapist for a few months and I love her. We mainly focus on my work, and some of the worries you seem to have. Work it in a general view but also specific in aspects of my life. As it is my relationship. I feel strength to get better while I am in the relationship. But I have no certainty it will work or not, if it will be better or worse. I admire you for taking the necessary steps in your situation, to prioritise yourself and your needs, to show your love for him, doing what you feel it's best. I believe it takes courage, and that's why I admire you
@alsea You are honestly so sweet 🥺🙏🏻 Thank you for your kind words!! If he has been supportive of you and understanding of your tough times.. It honestly shows to me he cares and cherishes you as a person. Not everyone cheats. There honestly are good guys out there. But having been through that pain - it really messes up your trust. It makes it hard to let people fully in - without them walls around or “metal detectors” that go off too much sometimes. You are doing great - seeking therapy and through your fear and uncertainty putting in the faith still. You are a good, loving and caring person for doing so, but also a smarter one because you wait for the fog of uncertainty and fear to lift before you do anything. Me? I am miles far away darting away running!! Ahahaha.. but honestly.. if you feel he has been good to you - cherish it the best you can do 🙏🏻 and I do hope and wish you guys the best from the bottom of my heart - together or/and individually ❤️🙌🏻 You know what is best for you deep down and I know you will work through what you’re struggling with and you will find the answers you seek too in time 🥰🙌🏻❤️
@ImALittleStuckInPast23
You don't know how much your words mean to me 😭😭 you're literally a blessing ❤❤
I like what you said of metal detectors, I'll give it more thought.
And I do need to tell you. We're both working on eachother, you and me, trying to figure out things to be better versions of ourselves, learn from our mistakes. But you see, I like fog, I like autumn and winter, so I feel comfortable working on this environment. And you, changing your environment to be able to work is great ad well. Maybe you also like winter and autumn and fog. Or maybe you like spring, summer and the sun. You're shaping your environment to be able to work better. Isn't that a great step??
@alsea Sorry I didn’t get back to you straight away!! But I am here!! 😁🙌🏻 Awww thank you for saying that - brings a smile to my face!! Your words really help me as well 🥰 And I enjoy our conversation!!
You put it so beautifully 🥰 Sometimes we need to change where we are to feel our best again 🥰 I really like a snowy winter where I feel at peace in the quiet and calm.. 🥰 We can only change when we feel comfortable and ok with doing so 😁🙌🏻
@ImALittleStuckInPast23
don't worry!! If I remember well, you went to a group therapy session or something, right? How did it go? if you are comfortable telling ofc!
And I am glad you think I put it beautifully, sometimes I feel like the way I say things make 0 sense and I make it complicated for nothing hahaha So i am really glad you liked it, I feel so understood by you 💖💖
About my situation with my bf, we had a big strong conversation, I cried a lot and I got out a lot of things. Now everything seems to be better. I don't know if you relate with this. Have you ever felt so disconnected from yourself, you stop acting by your own values and beliefs?
I feel this is what was happening. i try hard to fit in, to fill expectations no one is putting on me regardless of what I think, I put all my energy on that and I start ignoring my needs and what I want. I hate it!!!
@ImALittleStuckInPast23
I think you know when you love somebody or that somebody loves you is when you or they start doing the small things. The small things that nobody would know off the bat and are things that you have to understand and talk about with your partner. Things like memorizing their favorite drink order or how they like to keep their things arranged.
For me, if you have seen the All American series, the way Spencer treats Olivia is an example for me.
1. He always want to be better for her
2. Emotionally intelligent
3. Vulnerable
When their message or call makes you smile, not on the beginning of the relationship but also after the years. You put down your ego and your self pride to make your partner happy. When you are having any problem you may always run to them . Sense of safety and security is the love.